I'm not sure when I wrote this poem, but I found it in one of my old notebooks. I thought it was cute so I rewrote a couple of lines and put it on here. I hope everyone likes it.

As you watch the children play.

You see the future of today.

The doctor plays in the sand.

As the movie star swings above the land.

The fireman go's down the slide.

While the teacher jumps rope on the other side.

The scientist climbs on the monkey bars.

As the soldier plays with toy cars.

And sitting alone, never receving an invitation.

Is the president of our nation.


Submitted: August 30, 2010

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Comments

Reizo

this poem was very goog I like it check my novels if you like good luck with your work


Reizo

Mon, August 30th, 2010 12:19pm

Author
Reply

Thanks!

Tue, August 31st, 2010 12:25pm

Cleveland

In ten lines you've captured a micro picture of what happens in real life. Thank you for posting our poem.Now the hard part is to continue with editing. The poem looks easy and for publication it is necessary to move from the 'easy' to the finished product. Certain words might be interchanged. 1st and 2nd line 'play' and 'today.' Deleting As you' and deleting 'You see' will force the writer to think of something stronger. Do a line by line read and edit. The nd result will be worth the effort. The president is the President as you are thinking of one as opposed to 'a president.' Best wishes and keep writing.
Welcome to the site.

Mon, August 30th, 2010 12:32pm

Author
Reply

Thank you! I love the advice you gave me. That's why I'm posting my poems and short stories on here. To see what people think of them and get advice from other writers.

Tue, August 31st, 2010 12:23pm

angela1223

This is very good! It reminds me of when I was little and no one ever wanted to play with me...It's very sad, and a little amusing when you really think about it. No one wants to play with the President! Wow! I found this poem very enjoyable and powerful.

Wed, May 25th, 2011 9:09pm

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