its Funny

Its funny how times change
People putting up a face, making me believe they changed
Tearing down at the secrets I hold
Knowing that I can’t cry, I can’t bleed for the revenge that I hold
Taking in the belief of hope
How funny it is to watch someone holding the knife
Thinking the are aligning it for someone else
Only to take as many stabs as possible when you turn
Knowing how I feel, knowing it will hurt
Laughing as they turn the blade in directions impossible
I can feel my soul floating away
Heart racing with the disappointment in myself
Why did I let them in, allow them to hurt me
I believed that they were different
Running circles in my mind about the things that could be
The good that would come from forgiveness
Can I forgive again?
To watch me pull the tears back into place
Put on a brave face, for people who do not know
I can’t show the pain or I will look foolish
My sins will be shown, my wrongness brought to the surface
Letting them laugh at me as I wilt in pain
No one to talk to, no one to fix it
One more lesson in heartbreak
The passing of tides, the sky turning red with hate
The anger dwelling so deep, knowing I have to put on a new face
To protect my own secrets I must allow the betrayal
Lay down to be walked on, place a an x on my chest
Here I am to be hurt again
I don’t think they will miss me