Hitler's Dog

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
I was asked by a work colleague if i would write a little bit of verse for his wife. No clues about content, however it had to be called 'Hitler's Dog'...A bit vague but here it is, I hope she's pleased with it!

Berlin 1939

Submitted: April 24, 2010

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Submitted: April 24, 2010



Hitler’s Dog.

A clock struck eight at the Brandenburg Gate, and a meeting was calling to order, The Agenda’s most important item tonight? The irksome Sudetenland border, With wine glasses full, and table full laden, with music from Bach and Handel and Hadyn, All smoothing the path for a divisive motion, with guests having neither idea nor notion, Of what lay ahead in the mind of Herr Hitler, with most, concentrating on the food from the victualler, Bratwurst, Saurkraut, Brockwurst or Pate, accompanied with either a wine or a latte, A gourmet buffet with everything found was delighting the nostrils of Blitzen the hound, A slavering St Bernard of dubious dotage, without pedigree line or noble parentage, He wistfully imaged that if left alone, the olfactory meats would be bare to the bone, He raised his head from his spot by the door, and softly padded ‘cross the red hardwood floor, His nose smelt the scent of ham-bone and chocolate, taboo delights, banned by his ‘hund’ vet, Voices were raised, his master was shouting, Herr Eichmann was angry, Herr Hess was pouting, Fists slamming tables, arguments raging, a war of words the Generals were waging, While all heads were turned to the head of the table, Blitzen arose as quick as was able, In one swift dart he nabbed a sweet, dived under the table ‘neath Hitler’s feet, Swallowed the chocolate in one gleeful bite, whilst listening to his master leading the fight, For an hour and a half the arguments soared, at the head of the table Adolf ranted and roared, Nothing decided! Split down the middle, to invade or not? An enigma, a riddle. A show of hands, 10 for….10 against, Hitler’s face purple with anger and angst, “I know!” spluttered Hess, “We’ll count up the chocolates! Odd numbers….INVADE!.......evens….…well…. regrets!” So it was decided, that’s how it would be, the huge box of sweets placed where each man could see, Invade…hold back….invade….hold tight,,,,the counting was hushed in Berlin on that night, “Drie und veirtzig…43!!!” “ it’s settled!!!...…an invasion! That’s what it will be!” And so the seeds for a World War were sown, instructions were sent by signal and ‘phone, Tanks were assembled, Infantry mustered, whilst Poland negotiated, with righteous bluster, Hoping to stop the German aggression, which Hitler was set on with Aryan passion, So!...with 7 long years of Blitzkreig fought, one is left with only one thought, What would have been different… if that night in Berlin, Blitzen’s greed had not given in, The chocolate not stolen whilst all backs were turned, if Blitzen had not so covertly yearned, The outcome would have been evens and not odds, the fate of the world not in the lap of the Gods, The war would not have raged for seven long years, no death, no killing, no losses, no tears, There would never have been a war at all, ‘cept for Blitzen’s actions, so tiny, so small, Alas…. forever is entered in history’s log….the result of the actions of Herr Hitler’s dog!!

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