The Monkey

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
Funny

Submitted: January 29, 2010

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Submitted: January 29, 2010

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today was a normal day to me. It's French, I hate French, all that le & la. I just hate it. Then there's a knock on the door it's the messenger as normal , but he had a message for me, I never get messages. He said I have to go home or I would get shot, with a BB gun, in the crotch unless I get to the taxi out side in 20 seconds . At that moment I jumped through the window and rushed to the taxi. Then I did a duke of hazards jump through the window but at that time I got shot in my arse. I said I've buckshot in by britches.

The taxi has arrived home and I got a surprise when I saw that the front door was ripped from hits hinges. At that moment I pulled out my 500 tactical shotgun. I entered the house and I saw blood and my SISTER'S RIGHT HAND on the floor. I checked every room and there was blood and a body bit including my dads left leg. When I reached the basement I heard a strange noise. I opened the door and to my shock and horror. There was a monkey playing drums on the decapitated heads of my family. I then said play the blue man group. After that I fired a warning shot to scare the monkey but instead he pulled out two chainsaws and started the motor's. I then proceeded to emergency response plan number 2( basically I ran to the toilet and barricaded the door). I then remembered that I hid a gun under the bathroom rug. When I lifted the tiny rug I saw a massive minigun.

I set up the minigun so when the monkey broke through he would be a sitting duck. After 2 hours the monkey broke through then I said say hello to my little friend. Then the monkey went in front of the 50 barrels and said hello, what a nutter. Then I opened fired after 2 hours all that was left was a finger which I then burnt it with my home-made flame-thrower.

I thought the evil was over but it's only just begun, when I looked out side the bathroom and saw a mushroom cloud and soiled myself. I then (while walking like a cowboy) barricaded every window and door. I then I dug tunnels ten other houses and found survivors and found guns which include: a Barrett 50 cal, 2 RPGs&a M4 carbine with various attachments and ammo also numerous hand guns and grenades . After I found all the survivors I could I formed a assault group and rushed out the house gun blazing, killing all zombies in sight. When we reached the army base we got a surprise we saw the zombie ruler. In the words of Vicky Pollard he gave me evils. I the got out all my weapons and unloaded all of the ammo and he was still was standing. I noticed that where I was standing next to a challenger two tank. I got in as well as a few others got in. we fired all weapons and when he fell we knew we won. But when we turned round we knew the fight wasn't over!

To be continued in:

the Zombie.


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