Love Blossom

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
Autumn prefers being alone, in her own world where no one will judge her. Although the only time she feels welcome is when she looks at Kris, the guy in class everyone can't get enough of,including Autumn. However Kris has a secret, a secret he only wants Autumn to know.

Submitted: July 21, 2013

A A A | A A A

Submitted: July 21, 2013

A A A

A A A


Love Blossom

I remember when I first saw you, the moment you walked into the classroom; I wanted to take a photograph. I had unconsciously reached for my camera, the camera which only reveals itself when no one is looking. I instantly stopped when I knew what I was doing, and looked around awkwardly to see if anyone noticed me. I shifted in my seat and when I looked up again I saw you smiling at me.

It’s been 3 years since I met Kris, since then we haven’t spoken a single conversation. I can only look at him in my seat that lies far away from him. Period 4 begins and everyone quickly rushes to their seats, I take out my binders and pencils. Class is quiet and full of concentration; we all pay attention to the teacher’s lesson and take notes diligently like how students who want to go to university should.

As the last bell rings we all say goodbye to the teacher and get ready to leave. Everyone rushes to Kris’ side in hope of hanging out with him after school. I sling my bag over my shoulder and begin to leave the classroom, I meet Kris’ gaze. For a moment everything goes quiet and we’re staring at each other, he smiles at me and my blood rushes. I look down and rush out of the classroom as fast as I can ashamed that I couldn’t return a simple smile.

As soon as I get out of the building I place my camera around my neck and head to my favourite spot in town. My footsteps feel light and carefree as I walk down the road surrounded by cherry blossom trees, spring has just begun and the blossoms are beginning to, well blossom. I smile to myself as I take a picture. I walk past the trees onto the grass and walk down to the river side. I sit on a nice patch and feel the grass tickling my legs; I smile to myself and take more pictures, making sure I get the right amount of lighting in each shot.

After an hour of taking pictures my film is running low, I sigh and put my camera into my bag. I stand up and say goodbye to the river promising I’ll be back at dawn when all the fireflies come out. As I emerge onto the road again I bump into someone. Surprised all I can do is shout apologies while looking down, the person picks up my bag and brushes it off handing it back to me,

“Here, it’s alright no need to apologize. Is anything in your bag damaged?” I take my bag from him and look inside; I pull out my camera and make sure it’s alright. I sigh in relief and nod,

“Thank you, everything is fine.” I freeze when I realize its Kris, he smiles at me and I gasp. It looks like a painting, behind his gorgeous smile is the cherry blossom trees swaying in the wind, the clear blue sky visible between the blossoms, and the sun is shining making his brown hair glow. I can feel tears swelling up in my eyes and I immediately look down, am I an idiot? Who the heck cries over that? He’s definitely going to think I’m weird from our first ever conversation.

“Well that’s good, your camera looks expensive.” I nod awkwardly without looking up, why isn’t he leaving? Why is he trying to continue our conversation?

“You don’t talk much do you, Autumn?” the sound of my name makes my heart tingle. He knows my name. I look up at him after a few minutes of silence,

“I’m sorry and thanks once again!” I turn to leave and he grabs my hand, I almost fall from the impact, he scribbles something into my hand and then walks past me.


“Contact me sometime! I’ll be waiting!” I look at my hand and see a cell number messily scribbled onto it. I stand still for a moment remembering the warmth on my wrist. It’s been so long since anyone from school spoke to me; the biggest surprise is that it was Kris. Kris! I walk with a skip in my step as I head home, to my empty home.

 

“I’m home,” silence fills my ears; I go upstairs and throw myself on my bed. I smile at the cherry blossoms on my ceiling, I’m glad my parents allowed me to paint my own room. I feel comfort whenever I look at cherry blossoms, therefore my favourite season is spring, even though my name is Autumn. I pick up my camera and take it into the dark room; the red light makes my eyes feel uncomfortable. I develop the photos one by one then leave them to dry. I leave the room and take time to finish my homework; after that’s done I do my laundry then cook dinner. As soon as that’s done I take a bath, I lie in the bathtub and close my eyes.

Kris, his name lingers on my lips. He’s attractive, really attractive. He’s about 6’2” tall and he dresses well. He also has brown hair and deep blue eyes that glow in the sun. His smile shines brighter than anyone else’s and his kind heart is his strongest point. I smile when I think about him, but my smile fades when I look back to myself. I’m average; my hair is reddish brown like the colour of autumn leaves that hangs around my waist. My eyes are a dull green and I’m 5’3” practically a whole foot shorter than him. I sigh as I get out the bath and get ready for bed. Tomorrow’s Saturday I’ll take it slow, I close my eyes and drift off.

I wake up early; I quickly get ready for the day then sit down to eat something before I leave for the day. I take the bus to the children’s hospital; I always go down there on Saturday’s to visit the kids. I sign in as a volunteer and head to the usual rooms, to greet the kids. The kids seem excited to see me again, a few kids and I head down to the play room and I read to them. Soon enough some kids are sleeping and I’m left with nothing to do. That’s when I heard it,

“Autumn, is that you?” I turn around from the surprise of hearing my name. I see Kris standing at the door, leaning on it slightly. He looks pale and he’s leaning on the door for support.

“Kris, what are you doing here?” he smiles at me

“You finally spoke to me; you first, why are you here?” I gesture to the kids around me,

“I’m volunteering like I always do, now you, why are you here?” for some reason I’m comfortable with speaking to him, the words flow out naturally.

“You know, I’m just ummm,” he hesitates and his words aren’t clear,

“Are you volunteering? Or…. Visiting someone?” I look at him sadly, all the kids who are visited usually have cancer or need to stay for operations, it’s sad seeing children like this.

He nods, but his face looks twisted, twisted with pain. Then he grabs his chest and falls to the ground. I almost slip as I run to him,

“Kris! Kris! Someone call a doctor!” sooner than later he’s pulled away on a stretcher and brought to the emergency room. That’s when I realized he’s here because he needs to be. I feel tears swelling up in my eyes, judging from the way he collapsed it doesn’t seem as if his condition is something to look over. I make my way to his room after the emergency light turns off. I knock quietly before entering his room,

“Can I come in?” a small voice croaks,

“Sure.” I close the door after I enter and as soon as I seem him my heart drops. He looks tired, pale and shrunken. As if he hadn’t eaten in months, he seemed so healthy yesterday what happened? I sit down on the seat beside his bed,

“Hey,” he smiles at me,

“Hey,” I reply quietly. For a moment we just sit in silence not exchanging words.

“Kris if you don’t mind, what’s wrong with you?” I close my eyes and clench my fist as I ask the question hoping and wishing that he won’t hate me.

“I do mind actually, aha.” His laugh sounds half-hearted and cold,

“I’m sorry, I understand.” He laughs at me; I look up in surprise,

“Why haven’t you contacted me? I was waiting all day yesterday!” talking looks like it puts him in pain but he does it anyways. I may be thinking too much but it seems like he doesn’t want me to go. We spend some time talking to each other and I learn more about him, and he learns about me. I tell him about my obsession with photography and he tells me about his obsession with cheesecake. I really like talking to him, a little too much.

“How long have you been sick?” he looks me straight in the eye, in a moment he realizes why I asked,

“It’s been a year, recently my condition took a turn for the worst.” He looks down and avoids my gaze; I look outside and realize it’s time for me to go. As I turn to leave he grabs my hand,

“Will you be here tomorrow?” I nod and walk out of the room, I close the door and weep quietly as I lean against the door. All those years of watching him, all those years of harbouring unwanted feelings, I like him.

The next day I enter the hospital with a heavy heart, I know he wanted me to be here again, but what kind of face should I show? Before I visit Kris I make my way to the playroom to spend some time with the kids first, I peek through the door and almost have a heart attack when I see Kris smiling at me.

“Hey Autumn, fancy meeting you here,” I sit beside him and take the book from his hands,

“You knew I would come here first,” he smiles and closes his eyes as he leans on my shoulder, when I begin reading to the children.

Every day I visit Kris in the hospital, following the same routine however every day he looks weaker. Whenever I come I bring him a new photograph, he keeps them at his bed side. After about 5 months, Kris shaves his head and wears a beanie over his head. His face looks hollow and he skin is gray. I try not to cry whenever I see him,

“Hey, how are you doing?” he smiles at me weakly,

“I’ve been better, I feel better than yesterday though I guess.”  I hold his hand and smile at him,

“You’ll make it through this, you’ll get better soon.” He closes his eyes and begins to cry; flustered I reach for tissues, and hand them to him,

“It’s not like I want to be here. I want to be outside, with you.” His words pierce my heart; he clenches his hand with his other hand,

“It hurts Autumn, it hurts.” I can’t help but tear up as well,

“I know I know, I wish I could take your pain away.”

“It’s my lungs,”

“Kris?”

“The cancer, I have lung cancer.” The air grows heavy and dark, all we can hear is our soft sobs.  As soon as he’s asleep I kiss him on the forehead and go sit by the window sill, I lean my head against the cool window and drift off quietly.

When I wake up Kris is on the floor in front of me. I drop to the ground and scream for a doctor,

“Kris! Oh god no, please no,” I hold him in my arms his body limp and weaker than ever. He has a smile on his face but his body is cold, I freeze when I realize he isn’t breathing, his heart isn’t beating. The doctors pull him away from me and all I can do is sit there, empty and cold.

“Autumn? Autumn,” when I look up, Kris’ parents are standing before me, his mother grabs me,

“Is it true?! Is he gone?” I nod quietly, she begins to cry and his father helps me stand up, he hands me a box,

“Here, this is for you Autumn, Kris would’ve wanted you to have it.” I take the box and hold it close to me, as I slowly make my way out of the hospital.

I walk to the river side, the place where I first spoke to Kris. I sit down on the same patch of grass as I did before and put the box on my lap. I open up the box and see all the photos I gave him, beneath the photos is a letter with something inside, I take out the letter and leave the mystery thing inside the envelope.

“To my dearest Autumn,” his hand writing is as bad as ever, his words are messy and shaky, as if he erased more than he wrote,

“I remember the first day I saw you, I walked into class late, and there you were staring out the window, the sun shining on you. I tried to see what you were smiling at, and it was the cherry blossom trees. At that moment I knew, I wanted you. I always tried to talk to you, to get closer, but you always seemed like you were in your own world. Soon enough 3 years passed, not a single word exchanged. In those three years I was diagnosed with lung cancer, I didn’t tell anyone because I felt that no one actually cared. On that day I was diagnosed I remember how mad I was. Why was it happening to me? What did I do to deserve lung cancer? That’s when I saw you, standing on the river side, smiling as you took photographs, I always wanted to take a photo with you but you seemed like you preferred taking them then being in them. I remember how seeing your smile lifted the burden off my shoulders. That’s when I tried to learn about you; I asked around and learned that your name was Autumn. Such a beautiful name fit for you, I remember standing by the school gate waiting for you so we could go home together. But you always walked out through the back gate ha ha. Do you know what you did for me Autumn? You gave me a life after cancer happened. Meeting you, talking to you, being with you was bliss. After I was diagnosed I lived without caring, why should I care when I’m going to die anyways? You make me feel like I don’t have cancer, that I’m not just another kid waiting to die. Hey, you know what? I really like you Autumn. More than anyone else, the way you scrunch your nose when you think, the way you worry about me, the way your eyes turn into crescents when you smile, the way you say my name, and the way your lips feel. If you’re reading this letter I guess it means I’m not around anymore huh?” dried tears cover the pages, making the paper dent and crinkle,

“I lived a great life eh? All those days I spent watching you, all those days I spent with you, all those children we read to, all the kids we cried for when they passed. Honestly, I wanted to be with you forever. But seeing how you’re reading this letter I’m not around anymore huh? Autumn, you really like cherry blossoms but do you know what they mean? Cherry blossoms are a symbol of life, the life of the cherry blossom isn’t long it blooms then dies, withers away. So when they are in full bloom we appreciate and love them in their time of utmost beauty. So I like to think of our time together like the life of a cherry blossom, being with you was the shortest but most beautiful time of my life. I love you Autumn. Live on and make someone else’s life as great as mine was okay? Remember I noticed you.”

I fold the papers with shaking hands, my body is shaking and my face hurts from crying, I turn over the envelope and a ring falls out, engraved on the ring is “I Love You” surrounded by small cherry blossoms. I look through all the photos, and see a photo of Kris kissing me when I was sleeping. My chest constricts with pain when I realize this photo was from his last night. I put on the ring and kiss Kris in the photo. I drop the box and scream in pain, knowing I won’t feel his warmth anymore. The warmth I should’ve embraced when I had it. I hold the box and stand up staring at the sky,

“Hey Kris, I’m sorry I was late, but thank you for loving me as much as I loved you. Thank you for noticing me, thank you for making my love blossom.”

The End


© Copyright 2019 Airi. All rights reserved.

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