The Return of the Old Me

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
just some stuff off the dome

Submitted: August 21, 2012

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Submitted: August 21, 2012

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You told me you didn’t need me, that you’d be fine on your own. Now you’re crawling back, begging and pleading because you couldn’t take being alone. I gave you the world, gave you any and everything you ever asked for. How could you have been ok with leaving after all that, I mean who else could’ve given you more? No one, that’s who because nobody could’ve loved you the way I did. And when problems arose what happened? I stayed and wanted to work through them while you ran and hid. Have I ever forgiven you for all the pain and suffering you put me through? I would never. Only because I love you just as much as I did and I never want anything else, just us together. You come visit me, say you want me back, want us to go back to how we used to be. You look at me with those eyes, those piercing blue eyes and say you miss the old me. That one moment, that one second I take to look you in the eye and all of our past comes flooding back in my mind. All the love, all the troubles, all the struggles we went through were one of a kind. You made me a terrible person in the process and that’s what makes me shy away. But the power and passion of our love keeps me close, keeps me centered, really makes me want to stay. I’ve become a better person since you left and I told myself I would never make the mistake of going back to girl that tore me apart. All these thoughts are going on in my head and there’s a war raging between my mind and my heart. I’m torn between the girl who gave me the world and tore it down with a lighter and a knife. She put me through hell and back time and time again but she also gave me life. I have to thank her for doing everything she did because she made me a stronger person, in body and mind. I used to hope that I could have a universal remote so I could put my life on rewind. All that went through my mind in that one second, because that’s just what she does to me. And no matter how much I want to despise her I can’t, my love for her just won’t let it be. So I go over and hug her, wrapping my arms around her and wanting to cry. Because I know I still love her with all my heart and she’s going to be the reason I die. We get up and leave and I turn around for the final time, my mind attempting one last try to plead. I know I won’t be returning to this life, back to the old, back to the bud, back to the weed.


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