The reason I'm not dead yet

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
my thoughts

Submitted: November 30, 2011

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Submitted: November 30, 2011

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I walk around with a bullet in my pocket for one simple fact..it reminds me that there is one person out there that actually gives a shit about me. She's always in my thoughts even though she's so far away but when I heard her voice the day I was holding a pistol to my head all she kept saying was Allie don't do it I love you,its not worth it everything will get better trust me,you know that if you do this a little of me dies as well. There is nothing that I would'nt do for her she's my best friend she's the rock that holds me together when things get rough for me and in some way the universe has us connected. She knows when I'm having a bad day and I know when she is as well even though we are so far apart right now I know deep in my heart that one day we will be back together in some form. She always told me "just remember that I love you and always will" She's the reason and the only reason that I wake up in the mornings and look forward to facing another day. I just wish she was here with me right now so I could tell her I love her just one more time. I think of death often and I also know that if I don't get this under control I wont wake up one morning or I will end of shooting myself. Things have gotten worse for me but they always have I'm not looking for pity or attention this is just the thoughts I got going through my head.


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