How Can You Run From Yourself?

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

Submitted: July 14, 2012

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Submitted: July 14, 2012




I have no idea who I am anymore. There was once a time when everything wasn’t so crazy. So gray and insane; everything seemed perfectly normal. There was a time when I could breathe without feeling pain; close my eyes without feeling pain even. Once upon a time I didn’t need anyone. I’d be perfectly fine alone. I could go off by my lonesome and be perfectly content. Somehow someway I got dragged into a world I was never comfortable with. Every day is just a pain now. My mind lost its comforting edge. My moods lost their positivity. My brain lost all sense. I have no idea who it hit me like it did, but it did. The answer lies in my past and present. It’s a complication that I could never explain fully to anyone. But then again, how can you explain something you don’t understand yourself. Sometimes I see things and hear things. Sometimes I crumple over and writhe in pain. Sometimes I run away from unknown followers. Sometimes I hide from something that isn’t there. What am I trying to get away from? I ask myself this sometimes but I never have the answer. The only thing I could ever come up with is I. How can you run away from yourself? Getting away from something you can’t part from is the one impossible task. But maybe instead of trying to run I’m just trying to get back to who I was when I had control. There was once a time when I could stand my ground without flinching away from the hand of fate. It’s hard to believe how just a little piece of life can break down every barrier and damage you to the point you cannot be fixed. I cannot be fixed. It’s an impossible task.

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