Life begins anew

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic
17 year old Nikki James is being sent to live with her sister in Rochester, New York. Not because she's a trouble maker but to escape the man, who raped her and her best friend(Jessica) then murdered her,as he runs wildly through the city doing the same with other women. Can she really escape her past? Or will it follow her wherever she goes?

Submitted: April 16, 2010

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Submitted: April 16, 2010

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As the cab pulled up to the airport I think back to the conversation I had with my mom before I left.
“It‘ll be good for you.” she said trying her best to reassure that leaving my home town of Atlanta, Georgia would help me at all. doesn’t she understand that no matter how far away I get from here what happened will follow me wherever I go. How does she honestly think sending me away will solve the problem…I‘m not the one who caused it all…she was. These were all the thoughts swimming around inside my head that I wanted to say but when I went to open my mouth our eyes meet. I stared at my mother’s tear filled eyes and seen all the hurt and pain she felt by having to send me away. The only words I could manage to say were “ I know mom.. I know.” she smiled at me and brushed my hair back behind my face like she used to do when I was little. Back before any of this happened back before it even started…. I got into the cab and looked back at my mom waving as the cab pulled away. I quickly turned around and pulled my hood over my head so no one could see me cry. I hated leaving. I was born here, raised here, and I always planned to live here with my family, my friends and start my own family. Sadly life doesn’t always go as you planned. My mother always told me that when I was little and I would get upset when I wanted to go out and play but it rained before I could. I didn’t really understand then but this was like a moment of clarity for me. I finally understood. I just wish my lesson could have been less painful…for me and my mother.
The cab pulled up to the drop off area at the airport. I paid the cabbie and got out. I walked into the airport terminal and looked at my ticket. “Gate 29.”I said silently to myself. It took me 20 minutes to find the gate and 40 minutes to get through security.  Now boarding flight 267 to New York!” the speakers blared out. I walked over to the gate and gave the woman my ticket she checked and gave to back to me and told me to go ahead and get on. “Here we go.” I whispered more to myself than anyone else. I slowly walked down  the tunnel on to the plane and found my seat. Thankfully I was sitting next to a business man who didn’t want to be bothered anymore than I did. As the plane started down the runway to take off I pulled out my zune, turned it to Rhianna’s Disturbia and turned the volume up as high as I could stand it. As we took off I looked out the window of the plane and said my final goodbyes to my friends and my life through tear filled eyes as I slowly drifted off to sleep.
I was later awoken by the man sitting next to me telling me that the plane was landing. That’s when I realized I spent the whole flight asleep on his arm. I repeatedly apologized to him he laughed and assured me that no harm was done. He helped get my duffle bag out of the overhead compartment and walked with me off the plane. Once we were inside the terminal he met up with some people I assumed were his family and left. I pulled out my cell phone and called my sister, Angela, who I was going to be staying with and told her my plane just landed. When I got off the phone with her I went over to the food court and ate at McDonalds while I waited for her to call me back to let me know she was there. About twenty minutes later my sister, Ashley, called and said she was outside waiting for me. I closed my cell, threw my trash away and headed for the exit. When I got outside I looked around for my sister’s car when I heard her blowing at me from across the parking lot. She got out and started waving at me with a big smile on her face. I put on my best B.S. smile and waved back hoping that she couldn’t she past the lies my face was telling and see the truth written all over my heart. When I got to her car she had tears in her eyes. She threw her arms around me and started sobbing. “I’m so happy to see you” she half whispered half screamed in my ear. “Me too.” I said gasping from air. She finally let me go when I started hyperventilating. “We’re going to have so much fun!” she said while grabbing my bag off my shoulder and throwing it in the trunk. “ Yea…” I whispered. “fun.” 
Throughout the whole drive to her house I sulked and pouted. Ashley didn’t notice though she was to busy rambling on about how much fun we were going to have all summer. Every once in a while I’d throw in a “uh huh” or a “really?” just so she would think I was listening or that I cared. To be completely honest my only plan was to sit around the house sleep, sulk and eat until I could go home. It’s not like I don’t love my sister. I do. She has been my best friend forever. It’s just that I want to be home. My home. I really want to tell her the truth about why mom insisted on me coming here for the summer. I felt like I had this huge weight on my shoulders. Or like I was a prisoner of my own lie. I try to tell her the truth, but every time I look over at to tell her the truth I end up looking her dead in the eyes and seeing how happy she was that I was there with her. People always say that the truth will set you free, but if telling the truth means hurting my only sister, the one that’s been there for me since I was little then the truth isn’t worth. At least not to me.

Three hours. I have been in this car for three WHOLE hours listening to my sister ramble on and on about her life in New York. Honestly I didn’t care anymore. (not like I did in the first place) my sister doesn’t live in New York city but in Rochester, New York. So she thought it would be fun if we went the long scenic route since this was my first visit to New York. Oh yeah…..I was having a BLAST!!! Finally we pulled up to her house. I must say it looked better than the pictures she emailed me last month. Ashley lives in a 2 story house that has 2 bedrooms, 2 ½ baths, basement and garage. She gave me the grand tour of her house and told me her rules.( yeah right…like I was going to listen to her.) No guys, no drugs and no alcohol. So basically no fun. After the tour I went up to my new room while she ordered pizza. I quietly unpacked my bags and out away my clothes. When I was finished I laid back on the bed which was a lot bigger than the one I had at home. Unbeknownst to I had gotten so comfortable that I had fallen asleep, and of course the nightmares were still there. “No….please…stop…HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!” I screamed. I quickly woke up in a cold sweat and sat up and reached for the sterling silver cross around my neck and rubbed it in between my fingers as I struggled to catch my breath. I hurried off the bed and went for my purse. I dumped the contents of my bag on the bed in search of my inhaler before I passed out. Luckily I found and took a couple of hits before my sister bust into my room asking me what was wrong. Great! I thought to myself my chance to tell her the truth. But the on words I managed to say were, “nothing…just a bad dream…you can go back to bed.” great.. more lies. She gave me a weird look and started to leave. As soon as she left I shut the door back and went over to the bed and started to put my stuff back into my purse. When I heard her knock on the door. “yeah..” I called. She came into the room quietly. ‘ I forgot to tell you while you were sleep my work called and I have to work this week.” she said. “oh.” was the only thing imaged to reply. “ Do you think you’ll be ok here by yourself?” she asked. I put on my best B.S. smile and said yeah. She came over gave me a hug and a kiss and said good night. I couldn’t sleep the rest of the night. I was to afraid the nightmares would  come back. I guess I should explain myself.

Last summer when I was 15 (I am currently 16) me and my best friend Jessica were staying at my house one night alone while my mom was working late. We had done this before so we thought we would be safe. But we were wrong. About 12:35 a.m. someone kept prank calling the house saying that he was watching us. We just played it off as her little brother playing on the phone trying to scare us. At 1:00 a.m. a man broke into my house. He tied us up and proceeded to rob my house. Once he was done he came back to where he left grabbed me and took me into a bedroom and raped me and then he did the same to Jessica. Once he was finished he pulled out a gun and shot us both in the chest and left. Needless to say I survived but my friend Jessica died. When my mom got home she found the front door wide open, the house in shambles and me and Jessica up stairs on the floor half naked, shot and bleeding. Jessica was pronounced dead on the scene. I remained the hospital for about 3 ½ weeks. After I was released the police questioned me for countless hours on end about the attacker. The man wore a mask so I never saw his face but…his eyes. Ill never forget the look in his eyes. His eyes were so cold and uncaring. He looked as if nothing mattered to him. Like he was dead to the world and nothing could stop him from hurting us. No matter how much we cried or begged or fought. He was going to get what he wanted no matter what. Jessica’s parents along with my mom and the police constantly tried to assure me that it wasn’t my fault about Jessica. But I couldn’t help but feel guilty. I knew I wasn’t the cause of it but, I felt guilty that I survived and Jessica didn’t. Jessica was always a good child with good grades whereas I was always in trouble and very seldom had good grades. She had a future and everybody including myself thought I didn’t; but no matter how much trouble I got into and how bad my grades were Jessica always made me feel like I could do anything in the world. That night he didn’t just take my friend; he took my best friend, the one person I knew I could always count on…when she died I was officially alone. My mom made me go to millions of meetings with a counselor that specialized in treating people who had been sexual abused but it didn’t help. I still had the nightmares. It took me a year and a half before I could be anywhere alone. I was petrified. But this year everything seemed normal. I was hanging out with friends again and I was even dating again. But then about a month ago a woman that lived about 3 blocks away from me was raped the same as me and murdered the same as Jessica. At first I didn’t know what happened but people started treating me differently. Everyone was always asking me if I was ok or if something was wrong. I was completely oblivious to what was going on. Two weeks after it happened the police came to our house and told me and my mom that they believed it was the same guy. I freaked. I started screaming and I fainted. I woke up in the hospital 3 hours later with a minor concussion. This was when my mom decided to spring her great idea to me about me staying with my sister over the summer while the police continued their investigation. She said it would be best for me to not be there since he was back in town. We argued about it for several days until I finally gave in. so her I am thousands of miles away from home and still having nightmares about that horrible night.

“Nikki.” my sister whispered. Apparently I finally fell asleep in the fetal position on the middle of the bed. I slowly sat up, rubbed my eyes and looked around. “yeah?” I said.  “I’m getting ready to go to work.” she said. “There’s some money down stairs of you need anything.” “ok. Love you.” I said drowsily as I drifted off back asleep. “love you too.” she said before she pulled the blanket up over me and left for work.



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