101 Ways to Remain Insane

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
A nice little (or not) guide to keep your mind in touch with the insanity brewing.
(Please tell me if you want to be kept updated)

Table of Contents

101 Ways to Remain Insane

Submitted: October 09, 2013

A nice little (or not) guide to keep your mind in touch with the insanity brewing. Read Chapter

1

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 1.   Find a horrifically insane name. For example Unknown Person Who Has A Secret Mastering Of Insanity And Is Now Ju... Read Chapter

2

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 2.   You gotta test out your name on someone. Quick BUFFALO! Write it down three times. Find the person nearest to yo... Read Chapter

3

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 3.   Okay, now it starts that you have to go to some real effort. You need to do something you wouldn’t normally do... Read Chapter

4

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 4.   Go catch an animal. Any animal, be it a moose, lizard, bird, crocodile, platypus, lion (might have to go to the ... Read Chapter

5

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 5.   This one involves a few steps. Decide on a book that you absolutely loathe. And you must absolutely loathe i... Read Chapter

6

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 6.   This one’ll be fun, I’m sure of it. You gotta write a story or a poem. Sounds easy? It ain’t. You need to ... Read Chapter

7

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 7.   Find a public place (an elevator would be nice). Or you could go for a bus, a high-class restaurant, school will... Read Chapter

8

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 8. Let’s practice that laugh now. I bet you can all say you can laugh, but this, this is more than laughing. This is using t... Read Chapter

9

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 9.   It’s time to really practice that laugh. Find someone, anyone and do your laugh at a random time. If people re... Read Chapter

10

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 10.   If you’ve made it this far, it means you’re keeping with the insane. If at some point you stopped being abl... Read Chapter

11

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 11.   Turn on the television. It’s that box that plays stuff (all manner of stuff). Turn that thing on. Oh, but don... Read Chapter

12

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 12.   You’ll have to wait till your next storm to do this one. When the rain passes, if your luck a nice rainbow wi... Read Chapter

13

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 13.   This one could be tricky for some, extremely easy for others. You have to find a TimTam. Now, what is a TimTam ... Read Chapter

14

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 14.   Choose an accent. Any accent, at all. And pirate and dog do count as accents. Or you can make up your own. But ... Read Chapter

15

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 15.   Dress up as on old granny (don’t forget the hair) and go feed the ducks. Bread works best for this, but here ... Read Chapter

16

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 16. Go for a walk in the rain. Seems simple? Probably is but I ain’t admitting it. So here’s the catch. You can’t use an... Read Chapter

17

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 17.   Put a Christmas tree up in the middle of March. Hey, why not get a bit of Christmas cheer early. And don’t fo... Read Chapter

18

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 18.   Go on a holiday. In a tree. Now there must be a tree somewhere near you. Anywhere? So, pack your swimmers, or y... Read Chapter

19

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 19. BUFFALLO! ... Read Chapter

20

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 20.   Start thinking! This might be a real tricky one. You actually have to think, you can’t just let your thoughts... Read Chapter

21

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 21.   Smile at everyone you see one day. Strangers, friends, enemies. Who cares who they are, shot them your corniest... Read Chapter

22

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 22.   Make sense of number 19. ... Read Chapter

23

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 23.   In the middle of silence (and there has to be other people around). Then just jump up (with a big loud squeal) ... Read Chapter

24

Submitted: October 09, 2013

 Number 24.   Spend a whole day without speaking. Keep those lips tight and sealed. Screaming, squealing, singing, shou... Read Chapter

25

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 25.   Dress up all nice. In a prissy dress, or suit and tie. Whichever suits you. Don’t forget the lipstick. I hear... Read Chapter

26

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 26.   Make dinner one night. Now this could either be hard or easy, depending on whether you already know how to cook... Read Chapter

27

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 27.   Spend a day as if you are a flight attendant. Go up to strangers and offer them a drink.  Don’t forget t... Read Chapter

28

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 28.   Get 100 balloons and blow them all up. Blow and blow and blow and blow and blow and blow and blow and blow and ... Read Chapter

29

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 29.   Time to grab that basket! Go on a picnic. Grab a group of friends, or strangers, and pack that basket. Here are... Read Chapter

30

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 30   Let’s all fly a kite. Okay, does that need more explaining? I guess so (muttering to oneself, insolent sane mi... Read Chapter

31

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 31   Find a tissue box. Need more be said? ... Read Chapter

32

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 32   Now the greatest of all minds (and our minds certainly come under that now don’t we) needs a diary. Yes a diar... Read Chapter

33

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 33   SHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... Read Chapter

34

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 34 Go colour something in. Not a wall (though I know you will be tempted. Refrain people!). Paper use paper. You know that fli... Read Chapter

35

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 35   Hold your breath. Hold your breath. Hold your breath. Hold your breath. Hold your breath. Hold your breath. Hold... Read Chapter

36

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 36   Stage a play. That’s right, a play. Grab a few friends if you want, or do a solo act. You don’t need an actu... Read Chapter

37

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 37   Spot the difference. If you look below (which I bet my bottom whatever they say you will) then you will find ten... Read Chapter

38

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 38   Time to get those insane juices flowing. In the form of poetry. But there’s a twist (I hear y... Read Chapter

39

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 39.   Aliens are abducting you! Quick, what do you do? ... Read Chapter

40

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 40   Have you ever seen the Wizard of Oz? Gasp, you haven’t? Get out, now, get out! Okay, okay, since you beg. I’... Read Chapter

41

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 41   Buy an apron. Good, now that you’ve got one you can do what this was actually meant to be about. It’s time t... Read Chapter

42

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 42   Count to one million. Easy peasy … what comes next. Oh well, this is numbers not letters. I’ll start you off... Read Chapter

43

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 43   We have got to do something about making ‘looksie’ a word. Now if you’re like me (terribly insane, which y... Read Chapter

44

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 44   Time to change that fashion sense (which we all know you had none to begin with. Have you ever met an insane per... Read Chapter

45

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 45   Do ten push-ups. That’s right, ten. Now you! this is going to be really hard, really really hard, but you can ... Read Chapter

46

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 46 Quit a bad habit. Any bad habit. Stop it, right now. Or at least soon anyway. Be it shouting at that lady with the cat... Read Chapter

48

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 48   Stay up 24 hours straight. Wake up one morning (or more likely afternoon) and don’t close those eyes for anoth... Read Chapter

49

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 49   Drink ten litres of water, right now. Go to a tap and gulp gulp (no we are not fish, though there was a strangel... Read Chapter

50

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 50   And breathe…  It’s time to get meditating. Now you may think that meditating is all this stuff about si... Read Chapter

50 1/2

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 50 ½   Everything has to have a half and this is no exception. So, in the honour of this glorious day, you must do e... Read Chapter

51

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 51 Where’s that magnifying glass. I’ll use my magnifying glass to find it. Waiiiiit, that won’t work. Well scratch that ... Read Chapter

52

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 52 Who was the fourth president of Australia? Buzz in quick. Answers coming back after these quick messages. That's right,... Read Chapter

53

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 53 Dahkasd ahjdls toje jalud tjrler akjsda hljkyiureo wlafnmbdaj ksdkjas hdlarf jash dkjab djsakf eksh rlanfeeskjd sdjkakjbfjs... Read Chapter

54

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 54 You were abducted by aliens once remember? Nah, you probably don't, who would. But since you were, you now need to go round... Read Chapter

55

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 55 You're an alien now you say? Really that is quite a fancy thing, are you lying?. But you know you look like a trustworthy f... Read Chapter

56

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 56   Read number 57 before you read this one.       Lose 845 kilograms (not pounds or ... Read Chapter

57

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 57   Gain 845 kilograms. Easy peasy you say, probably is. But you may need some help from wonderful, me. What you wil... Read Chapter

58

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 58   LEGO! Do we all know that little coloured blocks that you sit together and make all sorts of thing? If you don... Read Chapter

59

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 59   When life gives you lemons, make orange scented tissues. Now, I know that to ask you to make orange scented tiss... Read Chapter

60

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 60   Quick stat, go to number 66. ... Read Chapter

61

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 61   The moon isn’t made of cheese, I hear you say. Preposterous! How dare those scientists contradict the mind of ... Read Chapter

62

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 62   Take a picture, you know with that little silver box thing called a camera. This may seem like a pretty easy tas... Read Chapter

63

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 63   Blob gulp blob gulp. Under the sea….. (there’s a song with that but I don’t know it). Today you’re all g... Read Chapter

66

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 64 Find a mythical creature (unicorns are galloping at this time of year). Be it a; nymphs, selkie, troll, banshee, basilisk, ... Read Chapter

65

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 65   You know, the anatomy of grass is a very interesting thing. The neutrons that grow inside it counteract with the... Read Chapter

66

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 66   Quick stat, go to number 60. ... Read Chapter

67

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 67   I will not lie. You will not lie. We will not lie. Lying is bad. Lying is not good. I will not lie. Repeat; I wi... Read Chapter

68

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 68   I will lie. You will lie. We will lie. Lying is not bad. Lying is good. I will lie. Reapeat; I will lie. You wil... Read Chapter

69

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 69   Once upon a time, there was a person. Whose task it was to find a fairy tale (Cinderella, Snow White, Rapunzel, ... Read Chapter

70

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 70 Do a crossword. You know, those little things with boxes and clues. Yeah, one of those (but don’t let it turn into a... Read Chapter

71

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 71   Get a plant, plant it somewhere and make sure it LIVES! Potted plants are acceptable. It can be any plant (I adv... Read Chapter

72

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 72   Invent a game, like a sports game. You’re rules (you can change it whenever you want). It has to involve at le... Read Chapter

73

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 73   You put your right hand in, you put your right hand out, you put your right hand in and you shake it all about. ... Read Chapter

74

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 74   It’s an emergency, what do you do? ... Read Chapter

75

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 75   Form a one-man band. For this you will need some sort of: tambourine, drums, accordion, guitar, harmonica, cymba... Read Chapter

76

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 76   Eat a food that you dislike. Any food, you just have to dislike it. It could be fish, brussel sprouts, chocolate... Read Chapter

77

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 77   She sells seashells by the seashore. Say it again. She shells seashell by the seahore. Say it again. Sh shells s... Read Chapter

78

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 78   Tumbleweed, chase it.  ... Read Chapter

79

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 79   Solve the greatest problem on earth. First, find out what the greatest problem on earth is. Then solve it. (This... Read Chapter

80

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 80   Out in the jungle, past the aridful desert and the rocky sea, lies the great ring of the lost. This ring, lost s... Read Chapter

81

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 81   Don those gumboots after the next rainstorm, and go splash in some puddles. Don’t forgot the yellow raincoat a... Read Chapter

82

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 82   Lava lamps are mesmerising things. Watch it blob and blob and blob. Look at all those pretty colours, ohhhhhh. ... Read Chapter

83

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 83   Ring ring. Hello? Oh hi, yes my day was good thank you. O, you want to sell me something? A holiday to Fiji? Wel... Read Chapter

84

Submitted: October 09, 2013

Number 84 Why isn’t it raining? Rain I say, rain! Well since me shaking my fist at the sky isn’t work, you must do something. Yes... Read Chapter

85

Submitted: October 13, 2013

Number 85   Make someone’s day. Be it with a cookie, or a big bunch of pansies, just do it and give someone a smile for th... Read Chapter

86

Submitted: December 05, 2015

Number 86   Spelling test! Oh I can hear you groaning now, you thought you were past the days of those dreaded spelling test... Read Chapter