I let the hot water of the shower burn my back that morning. It was a way for me to get rid of some of the pain. A part of my mind told me to skip today, but I knew that if I did, there would only
be more room to think about what had happened. Soundlessly, I stepped out of the shower and rubbed my hand across the fogged up mirror. I looked at myself, and all I saw was him. A stray tear
rolled down my pink cheek. Quickly I wiped it away before the water works hit. At 6:50am I began walking to my bus stop. The only other students who got picked up here were another girl and a boy.
None of us talked to each other, but I liked it that way. Especially today. Finally the "yellow limo" arrived. It began to rain after the next few stops. The rain always calmed me, but today it
just made me more depressed.
School felt more crowded than usual, but maybe I was just thinking too much. The reseptionist had ribbons at her desk and a pool of students crowded around to get one. Head lowered, I walked past the desk as quickly as possible and ran upstairs to my first hour class. Today I got there early, so I sat in my seat and listened to my iPod. The extra ten minutes passed by quickly, and before I knew it, the room filled with bored students. Before we officially started class though, the intercom sounded. It was Mr. Bartels, the principal.
"As most of you probably know, two days ago, we lost a student in a horrible accident. Jacob Meyers will be remembered as a kind, caring student and friend. His memorial will be held this Saturday at eleven in the morning. If you feel like you need help to get through this, the council office will be open anytime during, or after school. Please join me in a moment of silence," The quiet moment terrified me. I sat there, with an expressionless face. No counsiling could help me. It was pointless. "Thank you," Mr. Bartels concluded. My history teacher, Mrs. Reynolds, started to cry, but she was quick to wipe them away with a tissue. Everyone was sad and depressed... but I felt much more. My entire body and emotions were numb. My mind wasn't on History that morning, it wandered into complete nothingness. Mrs. Reynolds must not have minded, since she stared at me with concern and kept lecturing. When the bell sounded, I jumped and grabbed my checkered backpack. Everything seemed wrong. People talked too loudly, the hallways were too crowded, and if I looked into the crowd I would see him smiling, walking towards me.
My locker was finally in front of me, though I don't know how I got there. Somehow I remembered my combination: 36,18,06, but as soon as I flung it open, I regretted it. All along the door were pictures of me and Jacob. I remembered the day we went to the mall and got kicked out for skateboarding inside. Another picture showed me and Jacob kissing, I had drawn a red heart around us like a little elementary school girl with a silly crush. Angry, I tore the wall of pictures down and stuffed them in a small pocket in my backpack. Slamming my locker shut, I looked to the side and screamed. Jacob was there, at least I thought he was. Nearby students stared at me like I was crazy. Tears swilling in my eyes, I walked down the long, narrow hallway with my head down. Today was a bad day to have worn my hair in a braid. Suddenly, someone with multi-colored, high-top shoes stopped in front of me. Immediatley I knew who it was. It was Lily, my best friend.
"Hey, are you okay Cristy?" Lily asked, concern clear in her voice.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I lied dully.
"You terrible liar," Lily said while tears swelled in her eyes too. This made me cry even harder.
"It's going to be fine," Lily sobbed.
"No it's not. Jacob is gone! This wasn't suppose to happen!" I yelled. A young woman, probably in her mid-twenties, approached us.
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