Haha, this is awesome. It's just something I need to get out. It's not really awesome it actually
kinda sucks but if my friends read this and know who I'm talking about and if they could please
support in my decision I would love it.
The reason I decided to get it out is because I recently read a story on booksie called
'Sleeping with ghosts' by Miswriting and it related to my problem with this boy I dated. In this story
I am like the character Conan, In some ways. I left a comment on that and Miswriting replied on
my page with advice, I deleted this comment after copying and pasting it here
'Thanks for the read & review. I'm so glad you liked it, and related to it so much. :) I sort of see that as
my job, as an artist. As for your review - ah, just tell him what happened. He's ignoring you? Make him listen.
Be like, 'SIT DOWN HOE, I HAVE STUFF TO SAY.' Okay, maybe not...THAT direct, but I think you
get me. I'm not expecting you to run off into the sun set together, but maybe stuff will clear up if you tell him
what happened. "I didn't leave you because I didn't love you, so quit moping." Lol. Sorry, my scenarios
sound blunt, but that's because I'm deathly straight forward. I know this isn't my business, I just couldn't
help myself. :) Hope I'm not . . totally intruding or anything. Ha, ha.'So my friends wouldn't see it but
it just made me think maybe I should tell my friends and get more advice from people who could
maybe relate or could just help out so if you could read that story and then mine here or this one and
then that one and then give me some useful advice I would appreciate it so much. And yes
this probably seems stupid but I feel like I need to do it. And thank you. So here it is.
I think I'm going to need to go to counselling. And the fact that I'm too young to be in love sucks
cause it feels like love. And then older people are like you don't understand what the meaning of
love is. But I do, cause I feel it every time I think about him.
So I guess this is my plan, I know it seems stupid to write it down and plan it but of course I'm shy,
and totally having a lack of confidence at the moment but oh well.
Anyways I'll go up to him or something an I'll say 'I really need to talk to you' (and if I start getting
nervous I'll say something like 'this is a lot harder than I though it would be') 'It sucks I left it this
long and shit but it's been eating at me for so long.' And then I'll like take him somewhere
private where his friends won't bug us. And lets just hope that works if not I'll find something
else to do but until then.
I'll say 'I'm sorry we broke up, It wasn't cause I didn't love you anymore. It'll never be that, cause I
still love you and it's just that cause my people didn't like us going out and were always saying
stuff about us going out and I just felt like I was under a lot of pressure. My family were always
like why? You could have done so much better But if I've learnt anything it's that you don't pick who
you fall in love with fate picks it for you.
I know, blame it on others. But in fact I'm not really cause I admit it's my fault I cracked and took it out
on you and I am so sorry. I don't expect you to forgive me easily so I wanna make it up to you or
something. As long as we are just friends or something. Or just at least you don't hate me I'd be able
to at least get some sleep. Cause' I can't sleep any more and when I do all I can think about is you.
And it's not a bad thing dreaming and thinking about you, but it's just I was a bitch about us breaking
up and whenever I thought about you, which of course was all the time I'd feel bad cause of what
I done to you.
My family were always like why? You could have done so much better But if I've learnt anything it's
that you don't pick who you fall in love with fate picks it for you.'
By this point my friends reading this, if they are, are probably like shit she's in love with him. Why?
He's an asshole. But he wasn't to me when we were dating he was the most sweetest person and
never pressured me, never yelled at me. Wait, when he was mad or when we were fighting he
yelled but usually it was at himself.
Shit, this sucks cause I know that me and him can never be together again and I don't mind but I
guess just clearing this up between me and him would be nice.
But the only flaw with this plan is that I suck and I'm fucking shy as shit.
Thank you again.
If you could please comment and tell me anything, whether it be how stupid you think I am or
just some advice. Thank you :)
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