An hour glass

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

The final moments of life. How would you say good-bye to your loved ones?

It was a miracle.

My relatives said when I survived a freak accident. The words echoed through me once more and I smiled at the irony as I lay on a warm bed in the hospital surrounded by all of which I loved. The silent beeping of my heart moved on the screen next to me, though I couldn’t see it. I felt glad to be able to be there and see the ones I loved before I die.

It happened one unfortunate rainy night, my mom and I was on our way back from our regular routine to the indoor pool at the far end of town. The accident happened when a truck swerved into our lane and collided with our car. It was one of my scariest moments in life but when I woke up from the accident, I felt glad that I was even alive. My mom unfortunately didn’t make it, a huge part of me tore when my mom was being buried on the day of her funeral, back to whoever was the creator of all this world, back to being a dirt in the ground, back to being nothing.

My relief on being alive soon changed. A couple of months later, I was diagnosed with eye cancer—a gene inherited cancer—which dramatically blurred me until I was finally blind. A few weeks later, I was declared HIV positive. Don’t get me wrong, I never had sex or anything like that. It was when they operated on me in the hospital when they got me in time after the accident. They gave me two pints of blood which had been tested for HIV which was compulsory for all donated blood, but I guess this batch slipped through the cracks. So I’m just another statistic. Most people might wonder whether I was scared of dying.

My answer is always and will be. I accept it.

Yes. I’m blind and HIV positive. 15 and never will be 16.

This is a story of a girl’s last minute of life. I send these thoughts to anyone out there who could read minds. It seems tragic to most people but to me. Its life.

I remembered my dad being angry at what had been done to his poor helpless girl. I comforted him, by telling white lies. He soon grew acceptance toward me in my death bed so early of age. My Dad who used to be happy and relaxed soon grew into a stressed and miserable person in the few weeks after mom died.

My best friend gave me what little of life was still inside me and went out of her way to make a visit to the beach. She was a dear little thing, always adventurous and out to do what most people may say a daredevil’s career path.

It was my first time hearing the calm waves, feeling the sands in between my feet. It would also be my last. At this time, I was already blind. I regret not being able to see what my ears were hearing and what my feet are feeling but it was soon forgotten. It was better than not being able to feel the breeze lift my hair and the smell of salty ocean. It was one of the most interesting thing I have ever experienced. The entire silly thing she made me do, I could just say it for the whole day explaining and giving the most vivid details. Sadly, I don’t have that kind of time to spare but I still felt happy.

I smiled at the memory. The room was quiet as my beloved ones watched as my soul was slowly pulled out of my body. I heard the quiet sobbing of my friend beside me as she held on to my left hand firmly. I felt sympathy for her, for abandoning her. When I opened my eyelids, which was when I gasped because the most miraculous things happened.

I could see! It was like a blind man seeing colours for the first time.

I saw my poor friend hunched down on my hand, eyes red rimmed and tears flowing down the corners of her eyes like a river. I moved my hand stiffly towards her face to wipe the tears off her. She looked at me in bewilderment and saw that I was directly looking at her. She gasped silently as she realizes that I was looking to her directly in what probably could’ve been a long time.

“Don’t cry. Please,” My words came out like a whisper, “It hurts me to see you cry.”

My friend nodded weakly and sniffles back more tears. I moved my hand to touch her back and slowly pulled her to me, embracing her in my arms for the last time. She hugged me tightly and let go. Unable to contain her tears she went back to her silent crying. I felt guilty for leaving her but I knew I didn’t have much time anymore.

I twisted to my right to look at my Dad. It was the first time I saw him in months and it pulled my heart to my stomach. He looked miserable. Eyes rimmed with redness and puffy. His brown hair was growing grays which I never saw before but was plenty now. I realized that I was the reason for his sudden aging and my heart plummeted. My near-death is causing misery to my loved ones.

My Dad looked me in the eye and he quickly realizes that I could see him. He smiled weakly.

“Hey kiddo,” He said with an attempt to be bright and cheery which failed when his voice broke, “How’re you feeling?”

I smiled at him and that told him that it wasn’t going to get better, which brought pain in his eyes. I waved weakly as a silent gesture for him to hug me, he obliged. He kissed the top of my head and cheeks and came back to hug me again.

“I love you always, Dad.” Again this came out as a whisper.

“I love you too, honey.” My Dad replied, “Tell your mom I love her and miss her.”

I smiled and looked from the back of Dad to look at my relatives.

I gasped and I felt my Dad jump at my suddenness. He pulled me back to look at my face. I didn’t look at him; instead I looked at the person beside him.

“I don’t have to, Dad. Mom’s here to take me.” I managed to make a sound louder than a whisper.

That took my Dad by surprise and he looked behind him. I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to see mom. A broken angel.

But I could, she had a smile in her face but in her eyes I could see the longing for Dad. She was looking at Dad but then turned to look at me. She smiled and opened her mouth.

“Tell him, I love him. Tell him that I miss him,” My mom’s voice came out melodically, “Tell him that I’ll take care of you so that your passing will be easier for him.”

I nodded and looked to my Dad, who was now looking at me with all the anxiousness in the world.

“Mom says she loves you too and she misses you. She told me to tell you to not worry because she’s going to take care of me.”

These brought tears to his eyes as he suddenly realized what’s going to happen.

He gave me another hug and kissed me again for the last time.

“Time for you to go and join your mom, I will always love and miss you.” My Dad smiled a heartbreaking smile.

My mom moved towards me and stood beside me, near Dad. She gave him a kiss on the forehead but Dad wouldn’t be able to see and feel it. She looked and me and smiled.

“Bye sis.” I looked at my sister next to my Dad.

She looked at me with her tear covered face and collapsed onto me and hugged me.

“I love you sis.” I said and kissed her cheeks.

She replied back and kissed me on the cheeks and stayed there hugging me.

I looked to my relatives and then to my best friend. Lastly, to my Dad.

“I love you all. I’m tired. I guess...” I said in a mutter, “it’s time for me to sleep.”

They all said they loved me and everything. Most of them were silently crying.

I looked at them once more and slowly closed my eyes; a trail of tear ran down my cheeks. I know I will never open these eyes of mine ever again. I felt myself being sucked into a deep stupor and I embraced to the comforts of the darkness. Slowly, I felt myself fading into nothing.


Submitted: July 10, 2011

© Copyright 2022 AtMirah. All rights reserved.

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