the beauty of this day

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic

unexpected beauty

my walls are gone,

how can this be,

such meticulous labor,

in every brick,

but i couldn't keep you out,

now i'm stripped bare,

vulnerable and weak,

at the mercy of your whims,

you're all that's left,

my only hope is this,

that you never walk away,

because i don't think i have the strength,

nor the means nor the will,

nor desire to rebuild,

these walls you tore apart,

like gossamer veils,

and though you took my shelter,

i cannot fail to mention,

the beauty of this day.


Submitted: July 29, 2009

© Copyright 2021 autodocumentography. All rights reserved.

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Comments

guff01

like gossamer veils. What a great line. I think deep down the walls had to come down. Even though they were security from what lurked outside, the beauty could not be seen with them standing. It's a two sided coin, and both sides have their benefits

Wed, July 29th, 2009 2:15am

Author
Reply

thanks a lot that's exactly what i was trying to convey.good to have you back.

Wed, July 29th, 2009 8:37pm

Ryuzaki

Wow, so deep and broken, yet the last line seems like one's will to keep themselves up no matter what. Very nice.

Wed, July 29th, 2009 5:59pm

Author
Reply

thank you,i haven't written much lately so i wasn't sure about it

Wed, July 29th, 2009 8:35pm

Rekindled Love

I've said it once and I'll say it again. I love it! I'm thinking a little rewording on the "vulnerable and weak" line. You are not weak in any way. You are one of the strongest people I know. It fits the poem but it doesn't really fit you personally...

I just want you to know that I will never leave you. I'll be here for you always. I love you and for the first time in my life, I know without a doubt that I'm loved in return.

Kisses my love...

Wed, July 29th, 2009 9:44pm

Author
Reply

thanks babe,i'm glad you like it.

Wed, July 29th, 2009 8:33pm

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