crossroads part 4

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Literary Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic

evey wanted to die..

“Am I dead?” Evey asked Nate.

There was a long pause before Nate could answer. And Evey was thinking, looking at her hands. But she could see right through them. She could see right through herself.

“I’m a ghost!” she exclaimed.

“You’re not worried?” Nate was taken aback.

Like a child, she shook her head. “I’ve always wanted to experience this. Maybe I could fly, or go right through the wall. Or maybe I could scare someone.” She was grinning childishly. And, as if there was a bulb over her head that had just glowed, an idea popped into her mind.

“What?! You’re crazy!” he frowned. “You better go-”

“Hmm… where should I go first?” she said, ignoring him.

She had forgotten about him. Ideas flooded her mind, like there was no tomorrow. Recalling all those spinning and fading and changing of scenes, she couldn’t remember seeing Boris. And she wondered if he even knew at all.

Boris was her boyfriend. She met him at the same school 9 months ago. They joined the same school event and were in the same group. It was not much of a story and he wasn’t her type either. They had been going out for about 3 months. The guy was only 2 inches taller than her; had an almost bulky body, not because of food but of beer; he drank a lot, almost everyday of the week. He had short, wavy hair that he combed a lot even though it still didn’t make a difference.

He had none of the qualities Evey wanted her boyfriend to have. And she couldn’t remember what attracted her to him. She couldn’t remember even anything they had in common. Her music, which was an influence from Gabriel who was into metal and hardcore, was too loud for Boris. His movies were a little too rough for her, since he was into wars, battles, gruesome thrillers, and the like. She wasn’t. He viewed life as if there was always tomorrow. That was why he often cancelled their dates and said they always had another time. But for Evey, life was like each day was the last. And they often argued about that.

Gabriel did not like Boris. But Evey could be so stubborn and did not even think of giving up. Not yet.

Like Gabe, Evey was a little introvert. More like an ambivert actually. She only kept a small circle of friends and reasoned that she did not care because after all only a few were true. She often kept things to herself but sometimes, she would talk to Gabe. Though she had friends like Nate, Paul and Ron, Gabe was closest to her.

Evey was the kind of girl who did not like hanging out with a crowd. She was more into books and taking time alone with herself or the little park Frank made for her in their lawn; she would stuck herself with her computer or even with her mp3 for hours and not feeling lonely about it. But still she was not that aloof. People could still approach her and ask about homework, what time it was or which way they would go if they want to go to this place.

It was the same with Gabriel. But as the two would hang out with each other without arguing about small things, they usually had fun with the PlayStation, eating together, jamming with musical instruments or playing basketball. This was another thing they had in common.

And this was what others would call eccentric or exclusive kind of people.

However, when Evey met Boris, she tried not to isolate herself too much and hoped he would be understanding and patient enough.


She made up her mind. Forgetting all about Nate, she disappeared and headed for Boris’ apartment which was only two blocks away. The street near their school was still full of students. Some were to have their dinner. Some had other business. But Evey paid no attention to them. As she passed by them, they suddenly get this cold feeling as if there was wind that blew, when in fact, there was none. The night was not like the night Evey went out to meet Gabriel. It was perfectly still. There was no rain and not a cloud was in the sky. The moon was almost perfectly round and shining bright; so were the stars.

Evey looked up once and remembered Boris’ story about one star that shone bright during the first time they dated. Even though she doubted that story and researched about it, she did not hurt Boris’ feelings in telling him she knew he was lying. She was careful then, but pride could not accept it when trust gets betrayed.

It was not long when Evey reached the apartment. She was about to knock when she remembered she could go right through.

The apartment was a mess. Boris had shared it with two other guys, Evan Go and Harvey Vergara. There were bottles of beer and rum in one corner and a pile of books and papers in another corner. The table near the television, which sat near the pile of books, was full of papers scattered here and there. Someone had left the TV on.

Evey looked around. There was certainly someone watching the television when she heard a noise from the kitchen.

“It’s okay! I got it.” A voice said, and there was the sound of pans, forks and spoons that seemed to go out of control.

Evan emerged into the living room, carrying a bowl of fries. He was a short guy; an inch shorter than Evey. Chinky-eyed, fair-skinned and always wore a cheery smile, he always greeted Evey whenever they met at school. With the usual hi-and-bye routine, Evey always thought of the Chinese guy as problem-free.

“Hey! I just remembered something.” Evan called out.

Evey spun around as she noticed someone descending from upstairs. It was Boris. He waited for his roommate to continue.

“Your girlfriend had an accident. Did you know?”

“Huh? I think she’s alright.”

“I meant Evey!”

“Oh Evey. Yeah, I know. I was going to see her this afternoon but I figured her drug addict friend would be there too.”

She could not figure out what to call the feeling she had at the moment when she understood there was certainly someone else. Though she suspected about it before, her heart felt this crushing pain when she was sure of the betrayal. Irritated at first and then furious, she hated Boris right there and then. First was for cheating and betraying her trust; second, for being a jerk; third was for calling her friend a drug addict. She knew he meant Gabriel.

So you think you’re so cute, huh? The nerve! My friend was better than you, you idiot! You’re not even that close!

Like water boiled till 100°C, Evey could not contain her fury inside. This was the side of her she seldom showed to people, even to her friends. It would take a long time to anger her; but when full of it, she was like a volcano about to erupt.

Contrary with her hot head, she felt cold, extremely cold. She neared Boris as he was sitting on the couch beside Evan, preoccupied with the television.

“You said the fan was broken,” he turned to Evan. “It’s getting chilly in here!”

Evan did not seem to realize the unpleasantly cold atmosphere until Boris had complained about it. “It is broken.” He pointed at the rusty electric fan beside the bottles of beer.

Leaning closely towards Boris, Evey just wanted to strangle him. She tried to hold his neck even though she knew she could not touch him. But Boris gave a sudden leap out of the couch.

“What’s with you?” Evan asked.

“I thought I felt something ‘round my neck.” He answered in a whisper.

He felt it! She had not expected that. But Boris did feel it.

“Boris!” she said, wanting him to hear her. “You’re a jerk. You’re a good-for-nothing asshole!”

It was as if all she wanted to do was to scare the hell out of him. It sounded exciting and while she watched him before her, frightening him was definitely a temptation.

She held his neck again. This time, she put a little force in her grip. But she had no intention of actually strangling him to death. She did not even think of it as possible.

As quickly as jumping out of a hot water, Boris scurried out of the couch and turned around. There was fear in his eyes. Evan also stood up and looked around with a worried look. Scaring the chinky-eyed guy was not part of her plan but since he knew that Boris had another girl and did not even mentioned it to her, she did not care if she had scared him as well.

“I think I’ll go visit Evey first thing tomorrow.” Boris’ voice seemed to tremble.

“I think it would be a good idea.” Evan did not have to ask. He understood why Boris was acting that way. He looked around the room as if trying to feel somebody’s presence. When he was about to whisper something to his friend, the door suddenly opened. Boris and Evan almost jumped.

A lean guy, about the same height as Gabe, was standing at the doorway. It was Harvey; like a rockstar in a movie, he had this long dark hair, he often tied into a ponytail, which gave him a ruggedly-handsome look. He had chinky brown eyes that seemed to glisten as he smiled whenever he and Evey would meet at school.

Evey remembered the first time she met him. It was when she was getting out of a car. Her skirt was caught at something below the car seat, and she almost stumbled sideways. It was coincidence that he was passing by and caught her. Even though a little surprised, Harvey remained composed and waited for Evey to pull herself together.

“Sorry,” she said with a very flushed face.

He just smiled kindly. But she thought he heard him whisper, “I’m not.” With another smile, he went on his way after saying, “See you around.”

It happened 9 months ago. Only a few days after she came to know Boris.

Seeing Harvey right there and then, seemed to cool her down. He still stood at the doorway looking at her.

Could he see me? Evey asked herself as she was also looking at him.

“Evey?!” Harvey spoke at last, surprised to see her in their apartment.

That seemed to answer her question. And she remembered that one time she and Harvey had the chance to eat together at the school canteen. He had mentioned he could see things since his father died. He did not know why but he did not mind it. He wasn’t a scardy-cat, unlike Boris who was now retreating to a corner at the moment he heard Evey’s name.

Evey turned to Boris. One more try and he’ll scream like a girl. Or maybe he’ll wet his pants. She grinned at the thought. But Harvey’s presence seemed to make her hesitate.

Changing her mind, she said to herself, “See you next time Boris.” And before Harvey could say another word, she floated her exit out and then disappeared.

Submitted: October 15, 2008

© Copyright 2021 baday. All rights reserved.

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