It feels like the end of the world,
my wind pipe is slowly closing,
gasping for air -
I'm far from touching surface.
Feeling chocked up, feeling swollen.
same old faces -
waiting for the timer on the clock to explode,
as my heart paces.
Not knowing how to feel,
clasping my head in my hands -
why do i feel so washed up,
drowning in water, stuck in sand.
I have fallen so low,
Emotions run high,
forever suffering at night,
wishful thinking is destroying I.
Dreaming is easy,
waking up is hard -
dreaming about faded faces, blurs in the sky -
to then hit reality,
and realise there is no longer a you and I.
I have to wait years to be happy,
even when its simple to smile,
I cant hide the false hope -
Its a short phase for a while.
My mind is numb from overtime thinking,
constantly having thoughts about life's worth,
inside my heart is echoing,
its slowly sinking.
Feeling my body reject food,
knowing i can take control,
but its a burden with a bad pursuit.
Trauma is taking its toll.
Weak knees as i tremble to the floor,
the past is trapping me,
there is no key to the door.
Only i know when im ready,
and that is no time soon,
my mind is so unsteady,
i fear my tears will drown.
© Copyright 2016 beautifulwithlove. All rights reserved.