The Reality of Loneliness

Reads: 137  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 7

More Details
Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
I guess I just felt a little insane this night.......

Submitted: August 01, 2011

A A A | A A A

Submitted: August 01, 2011

A A A

A A A


 

Have you ever felt like the darkness was collapsing in on you

and you couldn’t breathe because the blackness was suffocating your soul

smothering you

so that you feel a fear everyone is afraid of,

 the fear felt in your core, your diaphragm, your essence.

You struggle-

inhale-

 tears push their way out.

You can’t move.

Shudders-

exhale-

 more tears, more burning fear.

You want to scream but you can’t get a breath big enough.

In-in-inhale,

and a small squeal is the only evidence that you’ve let that sorry excuse for a breath go.

More fear.

Flat out terrified that you’ll die,

die of the crushing silence,

unforgiving blackness,

 lack of air that is abundant everywhere,

 except your lungs.

Of the tears that will drown you before you can inhale again.

And now,

now you have the strength to move.

Your whole body shakes and contracts into a tight ball,

your defense against it,

against all of it.

Your eyes are plastered wide, wide open

but you’d be better off blind,

for then at least you’d expect to see nothing.

A wail.

Your terror has finally pushed out a sound from your soul.

With your hands clutching the clothes near your chest,

near your heart,

for all of the sudden they’re too tight.

 It’s all too, too tight.

It’s all too close.

It’s all too much and the air too little, too thin.

My fear too commanding.

The night too dark.

It’s too much, it’s too much, it’s too much it’s too much it’s too much it’s too much too too too too MUCH!

 “HELP!”

 is the cry you need,

the desperation you wish you could convey.

I’m the cause of the crushing of my own soul.

You writhe in your pain.

The pain only you can feel.

 SAVE ME FROM ME from me from me, save me please! PLEASE!

And no one hears.

And no one comes,

because you can’t say it.

You grasp your head squeezing tight, the craziness closing in.

 AAARRGG!!

 Loud in your head.

Silent to the world.

Short breaths.

 Eyes clenched shut.

 Fingers awkwardly held in a clench upon your skull,

Back arched.

Pain, pain, pain.

In eternal agony so deep,

so sharp.

And it’s only you.

No one else can feel it.

No one else can experience the fear, the fear from the loneliness.

No one, no soul, but you.

And the silence reenters your brain,

seeps down your spine into the nerves that calm your fingers,

that quiet your breathing,

that relax your legs,

and end your tears.

Deep breath.

And sleep.


© Copyright 2018 beautyofthebeast. All rights reserved.

Add Your Comments:

Comments

avatar
avatar

Author
Reply

avatar

Author
Reply

avatar

Author
Reply

avatar

Author
Reply

avatar

Author
Reply

avatar

Author
Reply

avatar

Author
Reply