Thinking Tonight

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
young lady,thoughts,depression,life,teenage....
just the hiddens secrets of some girls when they are down.

Submitted: July 30, 2012

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Submitted: July 30, 2012

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She sits on her bed holding her notebook.

The pages within are filled with the feelings she cannot express to the world.

People assume she is fine by her outer apperance,the way she looks.

On the inside though,she is one very sad girl.

The box of tissues is there beside her to wipe away her many tears.

Her past is haunting her tonight.

She cannot ignore the hurt,pain,regrets,or the fears.

She has been here before,but this time is different. She hopes she will be all right.

There was a time she thought she was so strong.

But then again,would a strong young lady cry like a baby?

Tonight is going to be very long.

She knows no amount of pills can help her fall asleep.

Why did i put myself through hell?she wonders.

She continued to make the same mistakes again and again.

Those young men could care less about her.

She was used. It hurt when that realization set in.

Then there is that young man she thinks she loves still.

After all those months they spent fighting,yellingat each other,resenting each other,and crying she still cannot let go.

They say she needs to get over him. She wonders if she ever will.

How she has so many feelings for him after everything he did,the world may never know.

When she thinks of love she often remembers the one she wishes she never lost.

He was perfect for her,treated her great,and did no wrong in her eyes.

She will not forgive herself for leaving him,whom she wanted most.

How can i feel like i love one man and miss another more?she cries.

Many nights she thinks of the loved ones who have passed away.

Tonight is no different. She still cannot believe they are gone.

She blames God,the world,and herself for their deaths to this day.

She wishes she had one more chance to see them,just one.

She lost someone to suicide.

She often wonders how he could do that. How?

She had hated him for leaving his family and herself behind.

He was in an awful place,and she has to forgive him It is too late to change it now.

Tonight she could be out partying,drinking.

That is how she usually hides her pain.

But she is tired of worrying her mother. She is sick of drunk dialing.

She is trying to stay far from alcohol,although it is driving her insane.

Tonight she will cry over it all.

She may even get a little too close to the edge.

She will pray to God. He will be there to catch her as she falls.

She will wait for a change.

Tonight is going to be hard to get through.

She will make it though.

Tomorrow is a new day. There are many things to do.

There is no time for hurt,pain,regrets,or fear,she knows.  


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