Blue Cocoon

Poem by: ben hardstaff

Reads: 761 | Likes: 0 | Shelves: 0 | Comments: 6

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THIS IS A POEM I WROTE ABOUT DEPRESSION FOLLOWING THE LOSS OF A LOVED ONE...

Blue Cocoon

Within these walls, my blue cocoon,

climb dirty plates and coffee cups.

My paintings hang uneven, slant,

on crumbling walls, whose cracks i feel.

A button's pushed: the T.V sleeps.

The metal God sleeps standing,

as a ghost of night that dreams of days

on an unmade bed in limbo lays.

Beneath the sheets my shadow rolls -

I twist and turn in turmoil.

My pulse pumps out a beat beserk.

In a sea of sweat i'm drowning.

Submitted: April 14, 2010

Poetry

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Comments

ChelseaB

I really like this poem.Great job!It expresses how your world can be turned upside down, with nothing the same as it once was.

Thu, April 15th, 2010 2:24am

Author
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thanks chelsea, kind of u to say. i'll read some of your stuff in a little while

Thu, April 15th, 2010 1:26am

thumblina Aka vandana

i have no words to speak.......but would like to tell you

It touched myheart real deep and almost in tears

Sat, December 15th, 2012 9:11am

Author
Reply

THANKS FOR THE COMMENT. THIS POEM WAS WRITTEN WHEN I WASN'T IN A GOOD PLACE IN MY LIFE BUT I FEEL SUPERSONIC NOW... THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING'S AN AMAZING THING.

Sat, December 15th, 2012 6:21am

matty6666

Hey I can't really give much advice, not a fan at all of poetry that doesn't rhyme! I was inspired by Rhythm and Poetry (RAP)

Is your caps button broke? Or is is a conscious thing to write everything in caps?

Sun, December 16th, 2012 11:32am

Author
Reply

HA HA, JUST CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO WRITE THINGS USING LOWER CASE THEN CAPITALS MATTY. I'M A LOVER OF RAP TOO IN A BIG WAY, IT'S JUST THAT WHEN FORCING RHYME IN POETRY RATHER THAN RAP OR HIP HOP IT CAN SOUND AS IF YOU'VE JUST PUT ANY OLD WORD IT TO MAKE IT FIT. JUST AN OBSERVATION.

Sun, December 16th, 2012 3:38am

Chrysta

This was very emotive and I liked the rhyme in your poem. I understand the feeling of being depressed.

Tue, December 18th, 2012 5:03pm

Author
Reply

THANKS FOR THE COMMENT. EVERYBODY FEELS DEPRESSED FROM TIME TO TIME. YOU JUST GOTTA KEEP ON KEEPING ON. SOLDIER ON. HEAD UP HIGH. :-)

Tue, December 18th, 2012 9:11am

Patri Poe

This was touching and true about losing a loved one. The image of dirty plates and coffee cups stacking up really emphasizes depression, along with disturbed sleep. A sad poem, but one I think everyone can relate to.

Thu, March 7th, 2013 5:30am

Author
Reply

Thankyou Patri for your considered comments. I think sometimes that the truthful, gritty pieces work well. I like to stay positive generally but everybody suffers loss, so why not get the most from it and create a poem about it?

Thu, March 7th, 2013 1:21am