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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Religion and Spirituality  |  House: Booksie Classic
Growth is pain. Growth is beautiful. Growth is self love.

Submitted: September 30, 2018

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Submitted: September 30, 2018



I don’t normally share long things like this, but I feel compelled today because maybe someone needs to hear this as much as I did. 

If you know me personally, then you know the last year and a half my life has been in complete turmoil; personally, professionally, and financially. It’s been a long journey of self discovery, seeking peace, and learning forgiveness for others as well as myself. A few months back it’s like a lightbulb went off. I changed my entire way of thinking from why is this happening to me to what can I learn from this. It. Changed. My. Life. Work has improved tremendously and I’m meeting goals I never thought were possible. I’ve learned loving someone and being with them are two vastly different things, and that letting go is the hardest yet most rewarding thing you can do. FOR YOURSELF. I was at war with myself. It was exhausting. It was heartbreaking. I felt hopeless. I felt like a failure. 
And so I started praying. I pray specifically for two people in my life every day. And the simple prayer is for their happiness, whatever that may be. I took the “ME” out of it. This morning as I went about my normal routine of praying for these two people, I got the overwhelming feeling that God was responding this time. This time he said to me after I prayed, “Why do you not pray for your own happiness?” This resonated so deeply. I hadn’t been praying for that at all. In that moment I felt it was his way of telling me. “Ok, it’s time. This season has passed.” 
Also in this moment I knew I wasn’t alone. He had been listening the whole time. He just wanted me to have faith. And now I will start praying for one more person’s happiness daily- mine.

Isaiah 44:3 “For I will pour out water on the thirsty land and streams on the dry ground; I will pour out My Spirit on your offspring and My blessing on your descendants;”

© Copyright 2019 Bethany Jayne. All rights reserved.

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