Position Open, Apply Within

Reads: 518  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 14

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

This started out as thoughts and feelings I have on being a father. It has truly changed my life. I've had many different jobs, but sometimes the ones you are least prepared for end up being the most rewarding. You know what I mean.

Position available, immediate openings.

Unlimited earning potential, completely tax exempt!

Full time only, must be available 24-7, weekends and holidays.


Leadership position, get in on the ground floor with room to grow.

No management experience required. Learn while on the job.

A chance to shape, mold, model and create.

Will definitely get your hands dirty.


Must be able to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders,

hang the moon, reach for the stars,

but be flexible enough to be wrapped around the smallest of fingers.


Must be willing to look under the bed,

face the monsters in the closet,

and take on the Boogie Man.

Must learn "The Look".

You know the one.


Are you ready for the biggest challenge of your life,

to not just invest in your future, but someone else's?

To not just leave a mark, but a legacy?


Can you pilot a vehicle with no steering wheel,

in the dark,

with no maps and few directions?


Are you ready to imagine the possibilities,

multiply by infinity,

answer the toughest questions?


Applicants will be required to surrender their hearts completely,

love unconditionally.

At times your heart may hurt, ache, or even break.

No whining allowed.


If interested, must be willing to change your name.

To Dad.

Inquire within.






Submitted: October 22, 2011

© Copyright 2020 bobthebuilder. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:




Relate, relate, relate.

I applied and got the position, I am a father of 2 wonderful childen. Only time will tell if I make the grade. 15 years on and I am still on probation.

Great message, recieved loud a clear


Sun, November 13th, 2011 8:54am


Glad you got it. "Dad" must be one of the most common names in the world. I hear it all the time.I was reluctant to take on the role, but it's be far the most rewarding I've ever held. Thanks for reading.

Sun, November 13th, 2011 6:22am



Now I've got a glimpse of what being a dad is like. Not sure whether I want children or not, actually.
You pictured fathers as heroes, and I'm not yet sure if I could handle the responsibility, say... 5-25 years from now.
But you reminded me again to respect my parents, which I already did, but still, thanks.
Thanks for sharing, I hadn't seen anything like this poem before. =)

Mon, November 14th, 2011 2:59pm


I think being a parent, mom or dad, is a tremendous responsibility. A lot a people don't take it very seriously, and that is unfortunate for the children. My son has enriched my life in so many ways, I hope I am doing good for him. Besides, I'll need someone to look after me when I'm old and senile.

Mon, November 14th, 2011 6:33pm



Three letters: Dad. AKA, IOU. I guess Mom also fits. Her job, equally daunting, is more "keep the home fires burning" while Dad's is "guarantee this home will NEVER burn!" or maybe i'm sezist...
Sweet and true, bobtheman. Thanks.
All regards, Wilbur

Fri, December 23rd, 2011 2:51pm


Not sezist at all, or even sexist. Moms and dads are different and have different roles. I am proud to be a dad, and equally proud my kid has a mom and a dad, who are completely different but equally loving and involved. Thanks for being a great fan and taking the time to check out my work.

Fri, December 23rd, 2011 4:36pm



footnote - gosh, couldn't even spell "sexist"! Now I'm a crappy speller sexist. sigh. W.

Fri, December 23rd, 2011 2:52pm


Since you're attaching labels, why not make it wonderfully entertaining, generous, kind, crappy spelling sexist.

Fri, December 23rd, 2011 4:40pm


Mike Stevens

If I didn't know you better, I'd think this was meant tongue-in-cheek; If it's serious, and I believe it to be so, good luck filling the position!

Fri, December 23rd, 2011 8:11pm


I split this one down the middle, seriously cheeky.

Fri, December 23rd, 2011 4:49pm



Wow! Great job. Now I can feel what being a parent is like. God bless my parents.

Sat, January 7th, 2012 7:44pm


Being a parent is the best thing that ever happened to me. I just hope I do a good job. I appreciate the read and the comment.

Sat, January 7th, 2012 12:47pm


Maria Linda

I can tell from the poem that you're the ideal father a child can ask for. I feel that the descriptions you gave about the role are but those that you have been as a father.

And no wonder that many fathers all over the world have been abandoning this position, the reason clearly stated on the 3rd verse. Apparently, they don't want the treasure of having the position which was stated on the 5th verse.

Well done sir BTB.

Sun, January 13th, 2013 11:33am


Thank you so much. I am blessed to have a wonderful son, and he lets me know it every day. But seriously, he is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I surely do appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.

Sun, January 13th, 2013 7:34am


Indie Skreet

I love this creative look on becoming a Dad. Very insightful and witty too. Great combination for being a great dad :)

Mon, February 18th, 2013 12:24pm


Best thing I ever did was become a dad. Thanks for giving it a look.

Mon, February 18th, 2013 4:57pm



Amazing, I love your style


Thu, September 26th, 2013 1:25am


Thank you!

Thu, September 26th, 2013 2:51pm


quiet dreamer

fathers are always heroes :D or at least most of the time. If you don't do anything very dumb you will fill this 'position' perfectly. This poem shows how much effort it must be to be a parent... and I agree with the previous comments 'a great thank you to my wonderful parents' :DI love how you describe all the tasks a father has to do. And that you are aware of them, makes sure you do great (that's at least what I believe)...
btw: I hope you don't get some kind of a crisis while reading all my comments :D :D :D

Mon, September 30th, 2013 3:33pm


No crisis, but it is a bit overwhelming! This is a tongue in cheek look at fatherhood, but let me tell you, there is no more wonderful thing than parenthood. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment on my work!

Mon, September 30th, 2013 10:18pm



I listened to you recite this wonderful poem and your voice brought it to life.
I enjoyed it immensely.
I can tell from this that you are qualified for the job!
Brilliant writing Bob.

Mon, October 14th, 2013 6:32pm


Thanks so much! I really like that we can add audio to our work. I have done quite a few now, it's pretty cool. I really appreciate you taking the time to come by!

Tue, October 15th, 2013 6:52pm



As a mother of three I can really relate to this especially the 'must be available 24-7, weekends and holidays' part. Great poem.

Sat, April 2nd, 2016 7:34pm

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