A truth unsaid?

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Horror  |  House: Booksie Classic
Is the truth best left unsaid? When can the truth cause more damage than a lie or just saying nothing.

Dislocation continues and a battle is being fought in the mind. Two people, one psychotic the other damaged and wounded... Only one will be left standing.

**CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE**

Submitted: June 28, 2008

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Submitted: June 28, 2008

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A truth unsaid?
 
 
Is the truth best left unsaid? Would stark confession make a bad situation worse? Would people understand? Would they treat me differently? Would they point and stare? Would they cut me off completely? Would they send me away forever? Take my job away from me? Take my life away from me? Confine me in an institution forever?
 
How can I know the answers?
 
I am condemned forever to keep my secret? Never to be spoken, never to be slipped casually into conversation? Oh by the way…………
 
People say they would understand and that it doesn’t change the way they see me. I am not convinced. People tend to shy away from something they don’t understand. Something that scares them something they could catch.
 
Don’t talk to him he is infectious……
 
Do they know what it is like? Wanting to say so much, wanting to hold a gentle hand and confess? Holding it all inside? Hiding the secrets that eat away forever?
 
Is it better to contain the cancer or to cauterize the wound? Amputate the infected part and throw it away……. Make the best of the empty shell that is left?
 
Am I now just an empty shell? Waiting to be filled with the latest slop of bullshit? Another sound byte, another podcast download a new mind onto a blank hard drive we can then reformat if it develops a fault?
 
Am I disposable? The latest trend, famous for 15 minutes, a quarter of an hour is that all we get? 900 seconds, not even a half life. Bored now lets move onto the next new thing, a new trend to suppress the people so they don’t notice the shit we are forcing down their necks. CICO they used to say, Crap in Crap out, punch in a new mind never mind if it’s fucked there’s a new one along in a minute.
 
Which one of me would they repair? How would they know which one is really me? I don’t know which one is me…….. I’m fucked if they repair the wrong one. Let him take over and finally stamp all over me. Kick me in the balls and leave me in the gutter so the dogs can piss on my corpse…… How do I tell them which one is me? Which one is he? Is he writing this? Am I writing this? Who reads this shit anyway?
 
Am I the psychopath? Am I the one capable of murder? Am I the one who would pour petrol on a burning man? Am I the one holding the match? How the fuck do I know? Is the only way when I am standing looking down at the corpse beaten and bloody beneath my feet? If I turned it over would I see my face staring blankly into his eyes? Would he laugh at myself? “You’re fucked sunshine. Now there is only me. The always was only me. You are not even a footnote in my history……”
 
Lets face it I’m fucked…… He’s stronger than me, he is me I am him how can I dispose of half of myself? Which half does the choice belong to? If its him then I’m fucked, if its me then I’m still fucked. I cannot defeat him, I don’t stand a chance against him. He knows what I’m going to do I don’t know what he is going to do he doesn’t let me inside anymore…………………………
 
I want out, Christ Jesus I want fucking out right fucking now. Get me the fuck outta here….. The bad man is coming for me…… Sweet Jesus deliver me from evil he is coming…….Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I must fear evil for I am but mortal and mortals can only die…………….. My lord why hast thou forsaken me?
 
It is too late……………. Howdy doody time kiddies the bad man is here……
 
Now its DISLOCATION AND YOU’RE FUCKED
 
Boneman 28/06/2008
©Boneman productions 2008
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


© Copyright 2017 boneman. All rights reserved.

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