Tackle box only in case of an Emergency!

Reads: 207  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 1

More Details
Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is the story of the famous Bakersfield!

Submitted: April 14, 2013

A A A | A A A

Submitted: April 14, 2013

A A A

A A A


Tackle box only in case of an Emergency!

 

 

This is the story that made the town of Bakersfield famous. This story takes place in the 1970’s, back when Jared Fogel was the all-time eating champion. Paddy O’McPaddington was a professional car driver, not in the sense that he drove people around, but in the fact that if he drove by you, you had to give him a dollar, let’s just say he made a lot of money. No one was quite sure why they had to pay him money, but everyday they were told by him that he was a professional driver who needed to feed his family of seals fish each night. That was until one day in the middle of July, Jack the Artificial Man came to live in Bakersfield. Jack was not actually a robot or even created in a lab, but he was still referred to as the Artificial Man, probably for his love of the taste of deodorant.

Anyways, on this day in mid-July Paddy drives up to Jack and asks for his customary dollar, and Jack gets so pissed that he grabs the nearest thing to him a fire hydrant and throws it through Paddy’s car window, he then proceeds to punch and kick all of Paddy’s windows out. When Paddy asks why he did that Jack pulls Paddy out of the car and throws him to the top of an eight story building from which he was never seen again. Some say he landed on top of the trampoline that is on top of the roof and spring boarded to the moon, but I know that is a lie because that is impossible. For that reason Bakersfield is currently the number one vacation destination for families of four.

The moral of the story is to make sure you check your travel brochure for not only historically accurate facts but also valuable coupons.

 


© Copyright 2018 Brian A Garber. All rights reserved.

Add Your Comments:

Comments

avatar

Author
Reply