Illusion by Brittany

I wonder through this darkness, 

Wondering if it will ever end

Tripping over my mistakes

Drowning in my regrets

"How could you not see this coming?" 

I ask myself over again

All the times you watched me cry... 

I should have known you were never really a friend

But I loved you

I thought you loved me too, 

Little did I know I was only in love with the you I thought I knew

An illusion... 

You would watch me bend over backwards

For just one hint, one word that would show me there's hope in all this HURT 

And you'd give me nothing! 

I would always say you're so uncaring... 

Reluctant about sharing what's inside

While I cried, you soothed me with LIES 

"If Only..." 
Those words had chains around my ankles 

No matter how much I tried to break free, 

"If Only" would hold me to you like a slave 

Though I didn't see it that way, I was a slave to this pain

And though your intentions were more than likely Good, 

You hurt me, the one person I didn't think would

I was blinded by you, the pureness I saw in you

There was nothing I wouldn't have done for you

If you would have just asked. 

I would have dropped everything,  

To be by your side. 

To look in your eyes one more time. 

To just have my friend, 

Little did I know... There was NOTHING left

Just memories.

But you know, I learned a lesson in life

So I'm not bitter. 

I learned I must only depend on myself to carry this hurt. 

And though you were never really my friend, 

You are human and you did have compassion... 

I guess I was just really hoping you'd be mine... 

"If Only," is Only a Lie

The painful truth disquised as hope

An easy way for you to tell me no...

After all this time, I can finally let you go 

I will never lead myself down this path again

I will never give into the illusions of friendship

If someone wants to be there, they'll have to prove it with their presence 

Because of you, I will accept nothing less.