Butterflies, r.i.p

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is a poem I wrote about my sister a while ago.
Laura Jade Smith r.i.p
December 8th 1999

Submitted: December 26, 2009

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Submitted: December 26, 2009

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Butterflies

She was just five years old
A slightly moody day
She couldn't stay away, from that rivers edge and I.
I turn my back to count
All the daffodil seas that surrounded
I close my eyes, and then heard the water wake up

I can still hear that scream, It's still lingering, in the air, everywhere
"Sister, please save me, grab my hand" I can’t I can’t
I can still see that face, sink beneath the waves. Laura please, breath for me, give me time I am here.

Were the angels that lonely?
Couldn't they suffice for anybody else?
Can't everybody just lie to me?
She's home, she's home.
Every night on a Monday, I will visit the same spot that I hate
Yes the place that Laura loved, and now she can taste it, it took her away

It's been ten years since then
And when it hits December
I'll feel like I'm dying again
Mum still won't even talk to me, talk to me!
Isn't this pain, guilt enough?
I can't even look out the window without seeing reflections distorted in the sun.

And the pain hits me like gunshot
And I'm heading on the way to the floor, I hear her name and it kills me
Bottles up, Bottles up, Bottles up

And I'm trying my best to hurt me
They say it's never enough
Razors to the wrist for each unshed tear, choke it up, drink it up, drink it up

Then I had a coma, when I crashed my car in the lake
I saw your face down there I knew, it was not a mistake
So I went to the doctor I told him oh my heart will break if I couldn't see you. He just gave me more pills.

But I saw you up there
Still floating by the river
God, you always loved that river
I bet your heaven looks just like it

Then I'll like it too, even though it scares me now
At least I’m with you
Were we can sit and we can talk about Butterflies.

 


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