Smile Solecito

 I haven't pick up a pen, pencil or brush.. it's been so long.

 I was suffering through heart ache....

 but through all of that  pain I found my new light..

 pick up my shades, there's a full sun in my horizon now.

 I've done my bleeding.

 I've hurt my worst..

 but It's time to SHINE my best!

 this isn't a heart break poem, but lyrics to a new song.

 only through the worst I could see myself sinking...

 violently sucked on the vortex of life.....

 past the point of drowning....

 pulled under dense pressure, constricting my very soul..

 darkness swallows me entire being.

 just accept fate?

 only in the silence of that darkness can I hear a thump.

 it occurs so rarely.

 my mind plagues me with tricks.

 it's last effort to resurrect me

 it lies to me!

 I begin to loathe my own mind.

 I hear it again.......

 ......THUMP.....

 I convince myself.

 these are just silly illusions.

 I hear it again.

 ....THUMP...

 startled, I search for it.

 where does it come from?

 THUMP! my chest jumps!!

 I begin to feel it.

 THUMP!!

 huh... who'd a thought...

 it's ME.....

 for some reason my heart still thinks it's ALIVE.

 got a reason to beat???

 do you!???.......

 THUMP!!!!!!

 it's so loud I can hardly hear myself think!...

 your annoying......

 my body vibrates.

 it SCREAMS AS IT BANGS ON MY CHEST!

 no more thumps....

 .......................

 ...............................

 ......................................

 BANG!

 BANG!!

 BANG!!!!

 why the hell should I EVEN TRY??????

 is it a survival mechanism to keep me from sinking to an abyss of depressing existence???

 BAAAANNG!

 it roars!

 screams at me.

 "OPEN YOUR EYES!"

 BANG!

 BANG! BANG!

 BANG! BANG! BANG!

 grunting it howls.

 "LOOK UP!!"

 "SWIM!!''

 I open my eyes.

 with all my might I push myself up!

 BANG!!!

 thick Darkness LEACHES my strength on every stride I take!

 suffocates a small glimmer of light up above me..

 BANG!!!!!

 my heart pushes against all the torrents!

 they wont stop crashing me down!

 EVERY THUMP!

 EVERY BANG!

 EVERY BEAT!

 EVERY STRIDE!

 thrusts me upwards against an OCEAN OF FORCE BEARING DOWN ON ME!

 it's sick violent waters preventing my escape....

 BOOOOOOM!

 in an ALL of last burst I use my soul and will to THRUST myself to the surface!!

 ......... I EXPLODE...

 shattering the barrier that once drowned me..

 I feel  the wind now,

 I can breathe,

 I can LIVE!!!

 thump....

 I can hear you now...

 thump.....

 I found you again...

 thump...

 been an eternity huh?

 thump.....

 welcome home.

 thump....

 back to life...

 thump...

 welcome back ME.

 thump...

 it says,

 ''don't forget''

 thump...

 ''keep looking up''

 thump.

 I see the sun beaming down.

 all it's shine on me.

 and then I just realize

 ....thump....

 I WANT TO FLY!!!!!

To all of those who ever felt the same: ''look up and don't forget to smile sunshine!''