No turning back now...

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic
Faceing the memories of a loved one after a tragic accident leading them to cease to exist. Pinting over memories trying to change them, reliving the moment.. blaming yourself

Submitted: December 06, 2010

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Submitted: December 06, 2010

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Ever since the car accident I’ve changed. It’s almost as if a ghost has taken me over, but I can’t help it. I should eat. I should talk. I should go out. But it all brings back memories, painful memories. Instead, I sit there at the window of my once peaceful room on a little wooden stool brushing thick black darkness over once beautiful paintings I created but now bring back hard memories.They must go. So I destroy them. Just like I destroy the memories. Memories may resurface but at least life recreations of them can’t… It gets hard having to erase all that ever was of what was. Sometimes you just can’t do it. So I look out into the depths of the ocean. See the swells, feel the surge, taste the ocean spray and then finally relive the moment of destruction I once faced first hand as the wave crashes into the rocks and tumbles underfoot to the incoming swell of water. Tears slowly fall down my cold pale cheeks as I relive every precious second, memory, thought. Every moment brings a new tower of emotions to wash over me. The fierceness of the emotions crashing over me changing my face mind and body from blank expressionless painfully empty to full of anger. Fury. But only towards myself…I should have stopped the accident. I could have…but I got distracted and for a crucial split second was in another world. Only to be brought back by the sound of tires burning as they screech to a stop against the road. The sound of a large crash and glass breaking. Images flashes as my eyes darted around. The road. The incoming car. Mum screaming at me to swerve. The crash… And one last flash before the blackout. The worse picture of all. It all seemed wrong. Distorted even. I saw mums head covered in blood with a piece of glass cut into her now flushed cheek. Then it all went black…
That’s when my life took a swerve into the dark dismal silence of death… But it shouldn’t have. I should have stopped it. I could have.
But I didn’t. And there’s no excuse for that.  So now I sit on my little wooden chair painting over the memories, desperate to change them.  Hoping that somehow this will make it all change back.  Even though I know...
Theres no turning back now…


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