The Summer I Was Sentenced

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Mystery and Crime  |  House: Booksie Classic

Its not finished yet. i would appreciate your input and if it is worth finishing. Thanks.

It has been so long. I can remember it clearly however.  Those fine summer afternoons Jamie, Anthony, Greg and myself. wandering all around the town, just looking for something to do. The first day I knew what I would become was the first and only day I regret. It was a warm day mid-80s and I was laying in the creek, contemplating the world. Jamie came stumbling my way, his old warn blue shirt hanging loosely on his chest.
"DID YOU HEAR!!" Jamie screamed still several yards away. I scanned my brain for the latest happenings within the town, nothing amazing came to mind.
"WHAT?!"I screamed back "HURRY UP!" He sped up to a brisk jog, being careful not to trip over rocks. Catching his breath he mumbled
"Did you hear the news about Greg?" I knew exactly what the news was, but I wasn't going to let Jamie know.
"No...what happened?"
"Oh my god how have you not heard? Greg's dad was found in the basement with a knife in his back."
"Jezz do they know who did it?"
"Well, they think Greg did." His face sunk and he kicked a rock into the water.
"What!! Why in the hell would they think that? That doesn't  make sense Greg would never-" I stopped myself before continuing,after all I knew exactly why.
"The knife." He paused "The one we got him for his birthday, that's the knife that killed his dad." He looked as though Greg stabbed him. He felt betrayed.


Submitted: October 25, 2014

© Copyright 2020 Cat13wolfjb. All rights reserved.

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Ashli1223

It is worth finishing but my opinion would be to take out the part about the knife being the birthday present they got him until later on in the story. You could make it more dramatic and draw peoples attention with that part. It is good though

Sat, October 25th, 2014 6:27am

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