The Future is mine

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fantasy  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is partly a true story of my bullying experiences in middle school and my life changing college experiences. Every character is indeed a real person in my life but all their names are changed. There are a couple of messages in my story. #1 please don't ever bully someone. It can truly ruin their life. #2 let go of your past, because even if you have a bad beginning, your future can be so much brighter.

Submitted: September 07, 2014

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Submitted: September 07, 2014

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The future is mine

… I was walking down the hallways of my middle school. She was walking next to me. I felt utter helplessness. The rest of the kids we went to school with were watching us, laughing at us. Or maybe just me? I never really knew. But there they were making fun of us. We were always the kids that were picked last, the kids that didn’t fit in, that nobody liked. That was us. Her and me. We were different to them. Honestly we even looked different from them. Or maybe it was just me? I turned to her. Her eyebrows raised. I knew what that meant. Calvin was right there, just hanging out. Then he saw me. His beautiful blue eyes filled with horror. This time she didn’t even have to say anything. He took off like a bullet. It was like I was a disease he didn’t want to catch. At this point, I just wanted everything to end. Being out casted, her, and everything else. This was my breaking point. I screamed “stop”! Everyone totally froze and stared at me. Then suddenly, I was falling, endlessly.

 I woke up. These nightmares. I had been having them all summer. I shook it off and hurriedly got up. It was Sunday, and I had to go to church soon.

When church was over, I saw Calvin. His light brown hair shinning beautifully. Our eyes met, then he turned away. It hurt so much. That’s when the flashback started. I had finally got my courage up to tell him how I felt. Conveniently, he lives down the street from me, so I just walked over. I arrived at his front door, and rang the doorbell. I waited. I was so nervous that I was trembling. I couldn’t help it. Then the door opened, and there he was. He saw me and looked confused. “Sapphire, what are you doing here?” “I just want to sit outside and talk for a second, if that’s ok?” His whole face expression changed. “I know what you’re going to say”, he began, “and you don’t have to, I know how you’ve felt since the day we met, however, I just can’t let go of the past. She embarrassed me in front of my friends, and many other people. Sapphire, I just can’t!” Calvin began to shut the door, but I stopped him. “Calvin, again, I’m sorry. I should have never of told her about my feelings for you. I thought she was my friend. We both know that I figured out later she really wasn’t but by then it was too late. She began to tease you in front of your friends, and no matter what I did, she would never stop. I couldn’t befriend the other kids because they had already established that I wasn’t one of them and never would have accepted me. We both know that. I was trapped, Calvin.” “I know you were”, Calvin replied. “But still, I just can’t forgive you. I’m sorry, I can’t be seen talking to you.” With that he shut the door. Then I was back into the moment. I shook my head. There was nothing I could do now. I did what I felt I needed to do. Time to move on I reminded myself. I tried to shrug it off. College would be starting soon. Soon I would be able to forget all about everything that had happened these past six years. I hoped anyway.

The day was over, it was time for bed. Then the next thing I knew, I was asleep again.

… I was in my old classroom. There was me and her, segregated from the rest of the class. “They’re all a bunch of annoying twits.” She said pointing at them. They paid no attention to us whatsoever. They didn’t care about us. “They’re all like I’m better than you because I’m all perfect and you’re not. Well forget them! I freaking hate them! They don’t like the way I am fine….” I started to tune out from what she was saying because I was thinking about Calvin. “Hey why are you smiling like that?” she asked me. “Oh no reason”, I said. “Oh come on now, Sapphire, what’s going on?” “All right well, I like this guy, his names Calvin. He lives down the street from me and he actually goes here, he’s a grade below us….” Then the next thing I knew, I was falling again. This time I landed in the cafeteria, in a chair. “There’s Calvin.” She said raising her eyebrows. “So?” I replied. There was her evil smile. “Hey Calvin, hey Calvin, Calvin!” She shouted as she pointed at me. I put my head down, I didn’t even want to look. Finally she stopped. “What’d you do that for?” I asked. “Just because.” She said. “Don’t do it again.” I said. “It’s embarrassing and you’re probably embarrassing him too.” “All right.” She said. “Never again.” Then again I was falling. This time I landed outside at the playground. Her and I were swinging at the swings. Calvin just came outside with a bunch of friends. “Calvin!” She yelled pointing at me again. With that Calvin just turned around and walked back inside the school. His friends laughed at him like it was hilarious. I wasn’t sure what to do. There really was nothing I could do. I wanted to just run and run far away and just never ever come back. But, I couldn’t do that. I had no other friends at school either. I felt helplessly trapped. The bell rang it was time to go back inside from recess. When I walked in there was Calvin and his friends. Before she could even open her mouth, Calvin saw me, then just went in the other direction. She just laughed. She was horrible. She was my only friend, but at the same time my worst enemy. She just laughed and laughed and so did Calvin’s friends. Then I felt myself fall and hit the floor. Then the next thing I knew I heard my alarm going off. It was time for my first day of college. I let it ring for a while as I thought about the dream. For the most part, it wasn’t a dream, those were flashbacks that I keep reliving in my mind. That was really why he hated me. She knew I liked him and teased him about it to the point where he would avoid me at all costs because his friends made fun of him for it. He didn’t always, but he did for years. By the time high school came he stopped avoiding me but we never really became good friends as much as I tried to be there for him. He could never just let this go. And deep down, neither could I.

In a blink of an eye, my first college class was over for the day. It was time for lunch. I went to the school’s cafeteria. There was a line so I got in the back of it. I closed my eyes for a second and accidently bumped into a guy. “I’m so sorry.” I said instantaneously. “No, it’s fine.” The guy said back. “What’s your name?” “Sapphire. What’s yours?” “My names Liam” he said. “Nice to meet you, Sapphire.” “Nice to meet you too Liam.” I said back. “You have anyone to sit with?” “No.” Liam replied. “Well, can I sit with you?” “Sure.” He replied.

So I had lunch with Liam. Liam had been homeschooled up until this point. He was extremely friendly and agreed to have lunch with me every week at the same time, same place. He had friends that were also homeschooled that were supposedly here right now too, but he had no idea where to look for them. Anyways, so Liam became my first college friend. Day one of college was a success.

The next day, I had a math class. I walked into the class and just sat down. Just then a guy sat next to me. I looked at him from out of the corner of my eye. He smiled at me and said “hi my name’s Kurt, what’s yours? “My name’s Sapphire.” I said back. “Nice to meet you.” He said still smiling. “Nice to meet you too.” I said. Throughout the class, Kurt would not stop talking. He was quite funny and very entertaining. At the end of the class he asked me where I was going next. I told him I was going to go to the cafeteria to get some lunch. He said he’d follow me.

 As we walked down to the cafeteria, I asked Kurt a little bit about himself. He told me he went to Midland Dow high school, wanted to major in computers and was planning on eventually transferring to Northwood University. We sat at the table and talked for a few minutes, then Liam showed up. I introduced Liam to Kurt and they started talking. A few minutes later, two other guys showed up. “Sapphire, Kurt, this is Gannon and Riley.” Liam said pointing at each of them. “Nice to meet you both.” They both said. “Nice to meet you guys.” Kurt and I said back. I figured out later that Gannon and Riley were Liam’s homeschooled friends that he knew were here the other day. Gannon and Riley were technically still in high school, just taking classes here. Together, the four of them became my new circle of friends. Finally I felt I had somewhere to belong.

Time passed. We all continued to meet together twice a week, same time, same place. It was pretty awesome. We’d talk about our classes, our lives, and sometimes, we would even play cards. The card games would get extremely competitive. It was pretty hilarious. I treasured every moment I had with each of them. They had no idea what each of their friendships meant to me. However, I continued to have nightmares about my past. That was until one day…

We had just put down the game of cards. Kurt was talking about some of his high school and middle school experiences. They were very normal. Liam, Gannon, and Riley never had much to say about what homeschool was like. “Sapphire, what was middle school and high school like for you?” Gannon suddenly asked me. “Well, uh, I’d rather not talk about it.” I said. “Oh come on, tell us all about it. We never got to experience what a real school was like until now.” Riley said. “Were curious.” That was when I told them everything.

I told them about her, Calvin, my nightmares and everything else. Not one thing I told them phased them. Liam turned to me and said “Well, that is all now a part of your past. You have us now, and were not going anywhere. Nothing you could tell us is going to change that. Everyone has a past. I think your nightmares are going to go away as time goes on. You should learn that your past doesn’t doom your future. You can be whoever you want to be. You just have to believe in yourself.” I realized that Liam was right. Just because you have a horrible past, doesn’t mean that your future will be terrible. It’s only terrible if you make it terrible. About a week later, my nightmares stopped. I finally found everything that I had wanted, a place to belong and some peace. The future is mine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


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