Ankle injuries and the Shallow Mind Or Chicks With a Limp Arent Sexy

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic
Ankle injures suck especially if your a hot chick.

Submitted: September 04, 2009

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Submitted: September 04, 2009

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Ankle injuries and the Shallow Mind

Or

Chicks With a Limp Aren’t Sexy

R U gonna skate tonite?

Nah ankle still killin’ me

What UR still nursing that ankle?

 

Seriously, someone who has ever had an ankle injury would never text that little beaut. Three weeks after my injury and I’m still hobbling around. It feels about 80% better than it did 3 weeks ago but it’s still only 70% back to normal.

Walking around in an ankle brace is somewhat like being pregnant. No one puts their hands on your ankle but everyone has a story. Interestingly it’s usually women who comment. “I sprained my ankle and it took an entire year to heal, it still hurts sometimes.” Or “your ankle will never be the same no matter what you do it will always hurt.”  My husband added this particularly helpful comment “Sorry babe, but chicks with limps are not sexy.” Even my daughters’ hair cutter had a story; “I sprained my ankle twice in one year. It made my ankle way more flexible.” She said as she contorted her ankle in an unnatural pose. Ewww, my injured ankle throbbed in response. Kinda rubbing salt in the wound when I can’t even walk without a brace and she’s showing off her improved flexibility. That being said, she had the most positive outlook on injured ankles. My middle son looked at me with his sweet innocent eyes, his eyes so full of love and concern. He takes my arm in his and said “you walk as fast as grandma”. WHAT! When he says grandma, he means great grandma who is 80ish. I’m 35. Ouch I think he bruised my ego! One week I’m Mrs. Hockey superstar, the next I’m a crippled/ limping old woman. On the positive side, I did develop compassion for my daughter who a like to say is slower than molasses on a subzero day.

Crutches are evil!!!!!

Dr. gives me crutches but no instructions or even any tips on how to use them.” Take these crutches, don’t forget your stuff, go downstairs to radiology for an x-ray then come back up here so we can go over your x-rays.” The nurse tells me. Easier said than done. I struggled with the crutches and my purse, which had a large hardbound Stephen King book precariously protruding from the top. As I awkwardly thrust myself into the elevator an elderly woman with a walker told me how much she hated crutches and how hard they are to use. “Just don’t put em in yer armpits or you’ll be sorry tomorrow.” I felt completely ridiculous and images of Jimmy from the television show Southpark kept penetrating my mind. All I need now is a stutter.  This is what went through my brain as I struggled with the crutches…. Step with good leg, then balance precariously on that leg as you put both crutches on either side, good, whoa watch out don’t let the book fall out of your purse okay good now put your weight on the crutches. CREAK, god even the crutches think I’m fat and they are announcing it to the world. “Hey everybody look at the fat chick who needs crutches to walk but can’t seem to use them correctly!!!!” After navigating the elevator down to xray and then back up, I finally re-arrived at the Drs. Waiting area and the nurse says, “I see your getting the hang of those crutches!” I was not amused. As I waited for the Dr I noticed the crutches had been set for a 5’8” person. Sweet the only highlight of my day, I’m tall!!!! Xrays proved the ankle wasn’t broken merely strained. Yes I said strained. I did not turn my ankle; I went into the board foot first so my injury was an impact injury.

I missed three weeks of hockey and endured numerous calls, texts, Facebook and Myspace messages concerning the status of my ankle. My ankle felt better, but nowhere near normal. Strapping on my blades on over my ankle brace was excitement tinged with fear. I made my triumphant return and played very little, so much for all the pressure my teammates had given me about them having to iron man the game. My tiny amount of playing time turned out to be for the best since my ankle was weeping with pain the next morning in fact my entire body was tired and sore and I was frustrated that this injury happed and was not healing as fast as I thought it should.

I hated knowing that I was doing everything I could and it wasn’t enough. I had to be patient; there was no quick fix for this one. My famous wait till the last minute and bust my ass to get it done wouldn’t work.

So here I am unemployed. I can’t play hockey, hell I can’t even walk without pain and I’m hoping against hope that life will get better from here. I would say if one more negative thing happens to me I will freak out, but one more thing always happens it’s what makes our lives so interesting. It’s a hard cold snap into reality when you realize you have little power over most of what happens to you. It is extremely empowering however to know that you have complete power over how you react to what life throws at ya and you can help those around you by having a good attitude.

The only thing I can do is be patient and keep putting one foot in front of the other (no pun intended) never giving up, always hopeful. If I happen to stumble I will pick myself up, forgive my self, and keep picking my foot up to take the next step.

 

 

 

 

 


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