HotchPotch(quirky verse)

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HotchPotch is a compilation of more than sixty quirky verses,all infused with rhythm and rhyme.

Submitted: December 25, 2012

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Submitted: December 25, 2012




(Version 2)











By Julie Patten




Sixty tales

In rhyming verse

Perhaps you'll praise?

Perhaps you'll curse?

However bad

There must be worse.

So take a chance

And read them first.











Just for You































































































There's nothing like a train journey

To let your mind wander.

And here we are, chugging along

While I look out yonder.


Thoughts of verse flood my mind

I wonder what to do

Thoughts that flow so swiftly

Like water rushing through.


The engine sound is soothing

Helping me to think.

I'm floating in a pool of words

With my pen and ink.


I pick them out one by one

'Til they all make sense.

What do I write? Turn the page!

Why stay in suspense?




I stand on a precipice, I see for miles

The fells beyond, the winding streams

The patchwork fields, the old farm stiles

The whitewashed cottage of my dreams.


All now shrouded in grey mist

They disappear before my eyes.

A powdery cloud that does persist

Gives the land a strange disguise.


The call of a distant peacock

The song of a single bird

These are the sounds that now unlock

The silence once unstirred.


The battle of the wind and sun

Now elements at war

Each tries to beat the other one

Their power to assure.


Will the sun burn through the cloud

Will the sharp wind blow?

Which will end up strong and proud

When the grey mists go?


Hawthorns, heather stand idly by.

Limestone rocks keep silent.

They've seen this battle of the sky.

They know this war is transient.


Now the wind, it blows the mist.

The sun's rays burn right through.

The cloud will slowly be dismissed

By the one with most virtue.





Skateboards scoot and cycles spin

School's out for the holiday.

Mum knocks back a neat dry gin

When the kids go out to play.

Orange squash and soda streams

Whoops and shouts and noisy toys

Sweets and crisps and white ice creams

For spirited and prankish boys.

With flouncy curls, sit sulky girls

Tucking into chocolate drops

In crop-tops and pale pink pearls

Licking sticky lollipops.

Summertime the nights are light.

Children stay up far too late.

Mum's exhausted by twilight.

Parents just commiserate.

But when the school's no longer out

And teacher's nerves it's time to fray

Mum's turn, then, to whoop and shout

'Won't need that double gin today!'





Open your mind just a little bit more.

Imagine you and I are together.

We could meet one day when my partner's away.

It would remain our secret forever.

We would talk, we would share, a bottle of wine.

We would laugh and stroll. Then we would dine.

With great discretion and utter delight

We'd whisper and kiss right through the night.

You'd go next day. We'd keep in touch.

Nothing too serious, but life is such.




The night was great.

Enjoyed the wine.

A gentle stroll

A lovely time.


I want no more.

So sad when you

Go out the door.

Today I leave

And come to you

To stay for good.

A dream come true.













If your temper's
Bad like mine
Would a row
End with strychnine?


What would happen

If we fight?

Would we die

Before the night?


I'd throw a plate.
You'd slam a door.
We'd stamp our feet
Upon the floor.
I'd smash a glass.
You'd be a prat.
I'd snarl and hiss
A feral cat.
I'd kick a chest
Perhaps a chair.
You'd give a growl
An angry bear.

How long would this fury last?

Not too long, I'd say.

Just our usual warm up
Before a 'roll in the hay!'



One glass of wine, you're nice to know.
A lively chat with two Bordeaux.
Fill the glass up once again
Much brighter now than other men.
Four glasses make you very funny
All the girls you now call 'hunny.'
Five glasses and your words are slurring.
Cardboard beer mats you start hurling.
Six glasses and your pants are down.
Now you're acting like a clown!
Another glass, you're up and dancing
Around the room so naked prancing.
Just one more glass you do insist
Even though you know you're pissed.
Nine glasses and you smooch the door.
A final glass... you hit the floor!!




An invisible spiritual thread

Something that binds you and me.

From this moment until we lay dead

There's a link we'll never see.

Sometimes apart we may be

But distance we can weather.

It's Spirituality

That keeps us close together.




There is no strength in the meagre flame.

It's weak and tepid against the cold.

Yearning for the gift of warmth

Is what you do when you are old.


Sit and shiver beneath the cover.

Hope the flame will grow with time.

The hours pass and nothing happens.

No-one seems to care a dime.


Your eyelids shut, you fall asleep.

The flickering flame is faint and low.

A drop of warmth is all you want.

But there's no warmth if you've no dough.




The dazzling globe is sinking fast

Golden yellow pulsating rays.

As final evening light is cast

A brilliant shining orange blaze.


White clouds turn to dusky pink

The shade of gentle summer roses.

Fells are splashed with hazy ink

The tint of purple heather posies.


Along the country lane you'll see

Brightness flashing through the branches.

The blazing ball peeps through the tree.

Cheekily, it leaps and dances.


Daytime colours, strong and clear

Turn to weaker, duller hue.

The distant hills a grey veneer.

Farmers' fields much drabber too.


Tree trunks bathed in burnished gold

With setting sun this glow does fade.

Once balmy day, now darkness cold

This is how the nights are made.


The sun it seeks another land

To show its face as morning starts.

A ritual that is daily planned

It disappears to far off parts.




On your marks

TO run your best.

StOrm ahead to keep abreast.

ThrOugh the pain within your chest

AnxiOusly to pass the rest.

LifelOng fame could be made.

DeliciOus win of this decade

ScenariO will never fade.

LimitatiOns not obeyed.



My passion will not pass with time

Nor will it wither through the years.

My heart avows that you're sublime

Such ardour never disappears.

I'll search in foreign lands for you

I'll navigate the oceans wide.

I'll take a boat to proud Peru

A wave of passion with each tide.

I'll journey to the ends of earth

To be with you where 'er you be

From ice-cold climes to peachy Perth

For you I'll chance the China sea.

I'll board a plane to anywhere

Climb Himalayas in the sky.

No single struggle will I spare

To be with you before I die.

This deep desire I must pursue

So passionate am I for you.




People all around,

Each busy with their life.

But even in this crowded place

Loneliness is rife.


So many faces,

Someone perhaps you know?

So many faces

But not the right fellow.


A word from a stranger

A simple 'hello'

But a word from this person

Sounds more like 'hollow'


It's not this smiling mortal

Not this face you seek.

It's just one special person

Whose smile is quite unique.


However many folk there are

No matter who's about

That very special person

There is loneliness without.


Friends call round often.

They come to your door.

They can't replace that special face

You knew so well before.


There may be many people

All around you find.

But it's just one special person

Who's always on your mind.







While crisp frost adorns the fields

The morning air is still, unmoving.

Stately trees like solemn statues

The silence of the dawn is soothing.


Warm in bed beneath the covers

Why does no-one greet the day?

Don't they know a world of wonder

Wakens, while in bed they lay?


Soft greyness of the morning sky

Gives way to brighter azure blue.

The sun is slowly rising, shining

Turning frost to glistening dew.


Now the silence disappears

The magic of first light it goes.

One last look at early morn

Before life brings dawn to a close.




Bankers think they're poor, without a big Jag

Beggars know their rich, with a sleeping bag.


The people next door, want a brand new car

When the one they've got, hasn't gone very far.


Auntie May insists, on another new hat

Granny feeds fresh fish, to her mangy old cat.


Five holidays a year, friends say they need

Is this what they call extravagance and greed.




Fitness for Work Interviewer

Just sit down and don't despair
Can you say 'cheese please?'
Can you swivel in your chair?
Can you clap with ease?

Work forbids that you go slow.

Never slack or shirk.

Can you wiggle your big toe?

--And now You're Working
Cook the burger on both sides
Check there's cola and French fries.
Add the sauce and salad too
Make sure you don't cause a queue.
Finish one then start another.
Try and cook like your dea

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