S.O.B Story episode 20.
Say my shame like a manta...
SET. Ty’s House-Night
Heather has just picked up the phone to call Ty’s Girlfriend.
HEATHER. I can't do it, I'm sorry.
TY. Don't worry, I will pray and ask God what to do.
HEATHER. OK, I'm tired of this magical rainbows and sunshine God! Your ‘god’ is a Bitch sometimes!
Ty, Looks hurt.
TY. Okay, I see how it is.
HEATHER. Ty, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to insult you. And honestly I mostly read the erotic parts of the Bible when I can't find my copy of “50 Shades Of Grey”.
TY. Heather, I read people well...and I know you have feelings for me.
TY. Gives Heather a look of “I’m hot and you know it”
HEATHER. I do not, besides we need to deal with Andrew. Remember you knocked him out cold! Not that he didn't deserve it, but still.
TY. Fine, but just remember God has a plan for you.
HEATHER. Yeah, sure.
FADE IN: To Heather and Andrew at their mansion.
ANDREW. Baby, I know you would never cheat on me...at least not on purpose.
HEATHER. I love you...I just want everything to be good between us.
ANDREW. I'm calm, I learned the art of meditation on our trip, so I'm very calm.
HEATHER. Okay, good, I gotta go see Lacey.
ANDREW. Okay, we can talk later, love you.
SET: LACEY’S LUXE APARTMENT. IT IS DECORATED IN A GLOBALLY INFLUENCED STYLE.
Heather and Lacey are talking.
LACEY. So how was your trip to India? You should've invited me.
HEATHER. It was good, romantic... I cheated on Andrew!
Heather, starts crying.
LACEY. It's Okay, (she tries to comfort Heather) everybody cheats at some point. Was he cute?
HEATHER. He was...He was Andrew's Brother.
LACEY. Aww Baby, you've had it rough.
HEATHER. I think I love him... Ty. He is a Christian, a good man, and a Doctor. He has the best body, his eyes are amazing.
LACEY. But, he's married right?
LACEY. And now you see how big of asshole Andrew really is?
HEATHER. Yeah, I do, but I can't have Ty.
LACEY. I am sure their are plenty of men like him. Dump Andrew's sorry ass and find someone new.
Heather. I can't, Andrew gets me.
LACEY. Does he? Does he really?
HEATHER. No, but he is rich.
LACEY. So am I, a real rich bitch.
HEATHER. I'll do it, I have to dump him.
LACEY. Good for you.
CUT: To the mansion
SET: KITCHEN/DINING ROOM-NIGHT
Andrew is preparing a romantic dinner for Heather
CUT. To a Ferrari
SET. FERRARI INTERIOR
Heather is in the Ferrari determined to dump Andrew, “Eye Of The Tiger” by Survivor. Playing the the background
Cut: To The mansion
Andrew opens the door and Heather sees the thought and effort put into every detail of the dinner.
ANDREW. Welcome, (he kisses her on the hand like Ty did before) you look ravishing as always.
HEATHER. Thank you, what is going on?
ANDREW. Can't a man make dinner for his lady without a reason?
Andrew takes Heather by the hand and leads her to the dining table.
He sits down next to her.
ANDREW. Sorry for being such an asshole all these years I've known you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
He stands up from the table pulls out a “Le Vian Chocolate Diamond Ring” and gets on one knee.
ANDREW. Heather Rosemont, will you marry me?
HEATHER. I..I will have to think about it.
ANDREW. Really? I would of thought you would've said yes...I mean after everything that has happened.
HEATHER. I don't love you, I love Ty!
ANDREW. Why! Because he is a better version of me?
HEATHER. Yes! I love the way he treats women!
ANDREW. Well you would know you were the one who cheated!
HEATHER. You never cheated on me?
ANDREW. Well...I...OK, I kissed someone when I was drunk!
HEATHER. I'm going to stay at Lacey's. Don't bother waiting for me! Goodbye forever you son of a bitch!
ANDREW. Heather, don't leave me.
HEATHER. It's too late for that.
HEATHER. storms out the door. She calls Lacy from the front porch.
HEATHER. Hey Lacey it's me, I'm coming over.
SET: LACEY’S APARTMENT-NIGHT
LACEY. I'm sorry about you and Andrew.
LACEY. I hope to never see his face again.
The doorbell ring, Lacey answers the door. At the door are a group of college kids.
COLLEGE KID. Hey, I saw that your car was dirty, I could clean it for you?
LACEY. Right now is not a good time.
HEATHER. I'll let you clean something else, how old are you?
COLLEGE KID.. Uh, twenty two.
HEATHER. Come with me.
She leads him down the hall into one of the many bedrooms.
COLLEGE KID. Who hoo, I'm getting laid tonight guys!
The other college kids cheer him on.
Heather Leads the College Kid into the bedroom.
HEATHER. So what is your name?
COLLEGE KID. Mark. Are we gonna do it?
HEATHER. Hell ya! Mark.
MARK. So should I take my clothes off?
MARK. Starts undressing
HEATHER. Listen you're a nice kid, but I can't do this to you.
I just dumped someone and I am kinda unstable.
MARK. Dammit, Bitch! I wanted to get laid!
HEATHER. You did not just call me that!
Mark. Ya I did, Bitch.
Heather grabs mark and throws him out the door
Lacey runs into the room
LACEY. Calm down, Heather.
HEATHER. What am I doing almost banging college kids? I am a mess.
LACEY. Can I tell you something?
LACEY. When you were in India I had a lesbian encounter.
LACEY. Yes, I had sex with a ‘Homo-Ho’.
HEATHER. Ha, Okay, so how was it?
LACEY. It was strange, but in a good way. Am I gay?
HEATHER. Do you like penis?
LACEY. Who doesn't?
HEATHER. Then you're not gay.
LACEY. Good, she was a vegan so I called her a Lettuce-Bin.
Get it? You know cuz lettuce bin sounds like lesbian.
HEATHER. That's great! I'll have to use that sometime.
LACEY. So, I think you and Andrew just need time, or I could fly you to India and you could have hot break up sex with Ty?
HEATHER. Fly him here.
LACEY. As you wish my queen.
LACEY. Picks up the phone to call Ty
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Script / Humor
Script / Humor
Script / Humor
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