childhood cut short

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
this poem is based on my childhood growing up in a house of drugs, alcohol and violence.

Submitted: February 26, 2012

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Submitted: February 26, 2012

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never had dreams a young kid should.

instead i would dream about dad killin mom and me protectin her in every way i could.

still to this day, i belive that he really would.

i never understood, 

and il never understand.

shotgun to the head, closed my eyes n prayed, if he shot me please let HER be ok,

and let me go to heaven.

things you shouldnt have to wish for when your seven.

i remember i would always hope he liked the dinner mom made or i knew it would be thrown at her face.

so i would sit on her lap just incase,

 but i guess it was dumb to think that would help cuz all this meant was we were both gettin food thrown at us.

he would say its to salty or not hot enough, by 10 yrs old i had enough, i started stickin up for mom.

he didnt like that, but i didnt care. i would throw the food back at him, something i wondered why mom never did?

afterwards i took the beatin but i was stil proud of what i did, then mom went crazy cuz he hit her kid. 

so i ran off and hid. 

i thought he was really gunna kill her that night, so i closed my eyes to block the sight. 

eventually drugs got involed, thats when i would be scared the most,

i knew when he was on them cuz his face would be pale like a ghost,

his jaw would move by itself. he started forcin mom to do the same.

still pain i never overcame.

both parents on crack.

something a young kid shouldnt have to witness.

i hated seein mom lik that, but atleast she wasnt gettin beat or thrown out on the street.

when i was 12 mom got off the drugs, and left dad, dam that shit made him mad.

she got a new boyfriend, he actually treated her right.

he made me realize what a real dad should be like. 

but dad would always try to find him. 

he would tell me how he was going to kill him and my mom both. 

i would beg him no. 

after 4 years mom decided to give dad another chance.

she left the one guy that actually treated her right, for one that beat her everynight,

i never understood, n i prolly never will.

dam the pain is still deep enough to kill.

even tho moms decision hurts me i love her still and always will.


© Copyright 2020 corrina. All rights reserved.

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