The Ruby

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Action and Adventure  |  House: Booksie Classic

Sarah Lake steals a Ruby

Sarah Lake knew she had a limited amount of time before he caught her. There she was, running along a river bank chased by her uncle, but, fortunately, she had still managed to take the necklace before she got caught.
Ah, the necklace. What would normally be a woman's jewelry piece had started the war between the members of her family for as long as anybody could remember. She didn't think anybody knew what it really did, only that it was important. Except for her. She knew that the tiny ruby in the center of the emerald on the pendant of the necklace was the key to a large safe... a large safe on the summit of Everest. Most people in her family would look at the necklace and think the most valuable gem on it, the emerald, was what held the secret. But Sarah knew better. She knew that it was actually something you could barely see without a magnifying glass. That was, in fact, the reason why she was being chased right now.
Risking a quick glance over her shoulder, she could see her uncle hot on her heels. It was only going to be seconds before she was caught. She threw a glance at the necklace, which was secure in the pocket of her sweater. She had to get rid of it.
Maybe...
She didn't have time to think, because at that moment a large hand collapsed on the back of her neck. The sudden stop from her frantic running made her lose her ballence, nearly toppling over into the river. Her uncle grunted, and tried to grab the necklace from her pocket, but quickly she grabbed it and, without a second thought, threw it into the river. And this river was 7 yards deep. Because the necklace was heavy stone it probably had already sunken to the bottom. None the less, Her uncle dove in after it, while Sarah just stared at the spot where it had landed. She knew that soon there would be Scuba Divers and Submarines searching for the necklace, but the jewelry be useless. For there, in her hand, was the tiny ruby.


Submitted: July 07, 2011

© Copyright 2020 cowgirl4000. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

Jabob

Well, overall, I thought it was well written and compelling, it was one that I actually wanted to finish.
I did however feel that it was cut a bit short, you mentioned a key to a safe on Everest and family issues but we don't really know what they are or hear anything about them, I feel it could have been expanded on, and it's a decent opening paragraph to a story.
Lastly, there were a couple of places where the wording was awkward for example 'She didn't anybody knew what it really did' didn't make sense.
Otherwise, nice job.

Thu, July 7th, 2011 11:46am

Author
Reply

Thank you, Jacob, and I realized the typo after a published it, and I will fix it. But I have to disagree on the shortness. The point of the short story was to be surprising and short, and I believe I accomplished that. But I will edit it and change some things.

Thu, July 7th, 2011 8:29am

Zin Dar

Original Short story.
Good work.

Thu, July 7th, 2011 11:49am

Author
Reply

thank you:)

Fri, July 8th, 2011 3:32pm

Zin Dar

@ Jabob
I just read your comment, I agree with the wording, but the shortness of this story is brilliant in my opinion. As for the point of a short story being surprising and short, it didn't need the extra explaining. I didn't feel any particular need for information about the family, the safe etc. because it didn't have any impact on the story itself, sort of random reason to be running. Good job Cowgirl.

Thu, July 7th, 2011 11:51am

Author
Reply

Thank you, Zin Dar! I agree with you; I think the idea of a short story is to be surprising, compelling, and short. Thank you all for your positive comments:)

Thu, July 7th, 2011 8:30am

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