A Guide for Rural Teachers

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
The honest travails of a teacher in outback Australia, where students put an enormous amount of effort into avoiding any form of erudition or education. If they put a corresponding amount of effort into their studies they would probably become geniuses. But alas, learning appears to be a highly unfashionable notion these days, and most students are under the delusion that they will somehow become rich and famous through no effort whatsoever. I blame Paris Hilton et al.

Submitted: January 02, 2012

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Submitted: January 02, 2012

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A Guide for Rural Teachers

“Oh, teachers if you’re seeking work

Go out west to the back of Bourke.”

Well, that’s a statement I once heard

But now I know it’s quite absurd

 

If you’re not from a one-horse town

They greet you with a fist and frown

And to be married is essential

Or you’re accused of being homosexual

 

They think it’s funny and you should smile

Whenever you’re called a paedophile

Don’t hope to find friendship here

You’ll drown alone in lonely tears

 

They smash your windows with a rock

And call you an old soft cock

I’d like to leave but can’t get far

The other day they torched my car

 

Teaching in the bush, it is pure hell

But if you’re tempted I wish you well

It’s a job you wouldn’t do for quids

I love the country – hate the kids.

 

*Note to North American Readers: the back of Bourke is the Australian equivalent of the boondocks, and a job you wouldn’t do for quids is something terribly unpleasant.

 


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