My Dutch Auction Marriage Proposal

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
The flimsiest marriage proposal ever.

Submitted: January 05, 2012

A A A | A A A

Submitted: January 05, 2012




My Dutch Auction Marriage Proposal

I’ve got nothing to lose but my life

And as I’ve never been married,

Nor even proposed to, I thought:

What’s wrong with me?

Do I smell funny or something?


So I’m putting myself on the market, at last.

After all, although I’ve just turned fifty,

I still have a future, however short or long.

So if anyone out there feels the same,

I’m up for it. I’ll do whatever you want.


I’ll give up vices (and they are many).

Not reveal my past (always problematic)

But I’ll be yours. It’s not that I’m

Desperate or lonely (first lie)

I just think I could be fun

For someone (innocent lie).


After all, it’s something I’ve never before considered

And I might make a worthwhile mate for someone.

I can’t promise you happiness

(who can?)

After all, I’m just a man. My only vow is:

I will try not to make you cry.

That at least must be worth something. 

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