My Life After Death

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
Friday August 13, 2010, was the last time I woke up in my room and made plans for the day. Happily getting ready to meet up with friends. The next time I would wake up would be 3 weeks later. In a hospital bed, only to realize the life I once lived... was over.

Submitted: July 09, 2015

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Submitted: July 09, 2015

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I was born in the Soviet Union, and things were not easy for my family. I am an only child, and my parents wanted to give me as many opportunities as they could so I would have a good happy life. After looking into some things, they decided we would all move to Canada. This was a new country, and unlike Russia, would provide us with many possibilities .

The first few years for us were very hard. It was in Canada where I finally learned about the Cold War, and why many felt the need to call me a ‘commie.’

As the years passed, things became better for me, but not for my parents as they had trouble adapting to a country that was not theirs. So they placed all of their hopes and dreams on me.
I was intent on making a good life for myself. I worked hard, and received a small scholarship to attend the University of Toronto. After graduation I had my whole life ahead of me. This however did not last long.
I have never once in my life had a problem with the law. I never did anything illegal and was a good citizen. My only fault was that I completely had my guard down when a young male police officer decided to interact with me.
As a direct result of this ‘interaction’ I am now physically disabled for the rest of my life and spend about 99.9% of my day in bed. The ‘Special Investigations Unit’ was assigned and quickly made it clear to me: I had no witnesses. It was my word against a Police Officer, so therefore it means nothing. I have no case. If I know what is good for me I will keep my mouth shut.
I have lost track of how many lawyers I’ve tried to contact. Because I am making such a claim against a Police Officer I am avoided like wildfire. I have no case.
The only thing I had left to do is to write about some of my experiences in the hopes that others can read my story and not be as naïve as I was. I paid an incredibly high price for my stupidity, and I hope that I can prevent at least one other person from making the same mistakes.

 

This Is My Life Now

 

In the beginning I had no doubt
I would return to the way I once was
There was no question about it


Years have now passed

Things didn't go back to the way they once were
And I finally realized I would never return to the way I once was

It took 3 years to finally realize the obvious

 
I once thought I would not live long enough to see my hair grow back
It grew back
Time went on
I got older
The nostalgia and longing for my old life got worse


I looked out the window today
And the pain cut deep

For me, the outside world is out of reach

It's there
It's real
But I am no longer part of it


I burry my face in my pillow and let the tears come
They always come


Every day is the same day
An overwhelmingly long day


 
I look into a mirror
The same face I see every day looks back at me
She frowns
At least I think that's what that facial expression is
A face that is held together with so much metal seems more robotic than human


My back hurts now, so I should lie down completely
That's also held together with metal
So are many other parts of my body

I don't have the strength to make a list of what's held in place with metal bolts and screws


I rest my bionic self in bed
As comfortably as I can
And sigh


 
My heart hurts...
Now that part is still human

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© Copyright 2017 Criss Sole. All rights reserved.

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