My Friend Aaron

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic
The friend I lost

Submitted: July 18, 2014

A A A | A A A

Submitted: July 18, 2014

A A A

A A A


I don’t throw the word “friend” around as casually as other people…I just don’t like to…I’ve had one friend in my entire life…And I lost him…He was my best and only friend…I call everyone else other things…Co-worker, Classmate, A guy/girl I know, An Associate, My cousin, My brother, My mother, etc…I believe the word “friend” should be taken more seriously…By everyone…Even kids…They should be taught what it takes to label someone as your “friend”…To me, a “friend” is first and foremost, someone who has earned about 90% or more of your trust…Someone whose number you can call and/or text at any time…Whose door you can knock on whenever you need them…To whom you tell about 85% of your secrets or more…And of course…That person that knows about 80% of who you are entirely…That’s a friend…For everyone else, a different word exists…Now, if I were to ask people to find those in their lives who fit all of the above traits to be qualified as a “friend”…Then, I wonder how many “friends” they’d be able to say they really have…I believe many would actually have to admit that they don’t really have a single “friend” at all…And probably have never had one…Now, it isn’t easy to find a true “friend”…I believe a relationship like that takes years to come across and years to develop…And I even believe that a handful of humans will leave this earth without ever finding someone they could truly label as “friend”…Which is sad…Probably the saddest thought to have…And I’m sad…Because I lost my friend…And I don’t think I’ll ever get him back…And I don’t think I wish to…Things are way too complicated between us…Too many layers in life have been lifted and I simply don’t believe he could get passed those situations…I could…I could forgive anything…Get over anything…I can do that…But, I don’t think he can…And I miss him…I miss him with all of me…And he probably doesn’t know that…Now I have no one I trust like I trusted him…No one I could talk to as easily as I could with him…And no one I could spend hours with…Like I did with him…Doing absolutely nothing extravagant…Nothing important…We were able to spend hours doing absolutely nothing…And that was great…That was therapeutic…Until recently…We’ve seem to have given up on each other…Everything he’d say started bothering me…As well as everything he did…And it isn’t fair to him…He needs someone who appreciates all of who he is…As much as I did in the first years we knew each other…I don’t know what changed…We got older…Now we like different things than we did when we were younger…And I guess neither of us is willing to change along with the other…But rather, change alone…Without needing each other…Without introducing each other to the new us…Or accepting the changes in each other…It’s difficult…Knowing someone for so long…Having spent so much time with them…And then POOF!...They’re gone…The person you knew or at least thought you did, isn’t there anymore…And not just there in front of you…But, they aren’t there in that body either…Or maybe they never were…And you’ve just realized that…You’ve just noticed how different you two are…How being together isn’t going to work…How you want something different…But are afraid to start a new life without them…Because they were here for so long…And now they’re not…Now you have to find a new friend…A new life…Things will change…And you just have to adapt…Because if you don’t…You’ll end up alone…You’ll end up depressed…And sad…And that’s not a life worth living…That wouldn’t be the way to spend your years on this planet…Because what’d be the point?...What’d be the point of life if you’re sad every day?...I won't mourn my friend forever...No one should...I want my friend back...But if I can't have him back...Then, I won't be sad forever


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