The Long Luscious Locks

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
*A short story about one of my past teachers, which received some interesting feedback as to the content; quick read*

Submitted: March 20, 2016

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Submitted: March 20, 2016



The Long Luscious Locks

An Original

There once existed a town where every person had long luscious locks: the men had locks, the women had locks, and even the babies had locks as soon as they came out of the womb. These long luscious locks were the epitome of a wonderfully flowing mane, one so grand even the resident lions in the zoo expressed jealousy. The greatest of the town was a man named Can Donnelly, who boasted the greatest flowing locks the town had ever seen. Having spent years perfecting each strand down to the scalp, his hair flew this and about during his daily jog, and it rippled in the moonlight like a rock across water…with locks. He was the poster boy, or so to say, his locks, were the pride and joy of the town. Yet, the town across the way, known as BareVille, was not so enthusiastic. The denizens of this town were afflicted with a most curious oddity where, after someone was born, they were unable to grow hair anywhere: no here, nor there…why, not anywhere! They were even more so jealous than the lions, because all they had were sphynx cats. Yet, in particular they despised Can Donnelly; the way in which he would overdo every movement to show off his assets and watch his hair get caught up in his face. So, late one night, the barbers of BareVille, who, up until this point had had no other job, sneak across into the long luscious locks town and into Can Donnelly’s house. Using trimmers, they shave off his long luscious locks, which fall pathetically to the ground. After the deed is done, the barbers sneak out and back to BareVille, where every member of the town will get one strand of Donnelly’s once long luscious locks.

In the early hours of Long-Luscious-Lock Town, a manly shriek can be heard issuing from Can Donnelly’s house. Running out, no longer in a steady jog, but rather a tumultuous stomping, Donnelly proclaims that his locks are gone! Hearing the noise, the luscious locks people drone steadily out of their homes to surround Donnelly. They stare at him long and hard, before a murmur rises from the crowd.

“His head is so shiny,” one proclaims.

“So gleaming, so wonderful, says another; I want my head like that!” says another.

Looking around, Donnelly suddenly sees people pulling their phones out from the depths of their long luscious locks and calling the barbers from across the way to schedule appointments for a full head shaving. That day, over 300 heads were shaved, and all of the excess hair went to the citizens of BareVille, who fashioned wigs and got their wish. The barbers were happy because they now had a steady job, and the citizens of the long luscious locks now gracefully glide through their town, unhindered by their once long-hair.

As for Donnelly? Well, he’s just happy now that hair doesn’t get in his food. 

© Copyright 2017 Dan Zuniga. All rights reserved.

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