Only Silence Answers

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic
I wrote this on the death anniversary of a loved one. I'm sorry if it offends anyone; I was really upset and just getting my feelings out.
Do I say I hope you enjoy? Hmm...

Submitted: May 28, 2011

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Submitted: May 28, 2011

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Only Silence Answers
 I throw my head back to the sky
Blotted and gray
My heart hangs heavy
Grief roils within me
“Why,” I whisper, “Why me?”
But only silence answers.
 
I need answers to carry on
I didn’t pick this life
I didn’t choose to carry this burden
I didn’t pick this cross to bear
“So who did?” I scream, “tell me now!”
But only silence answers.
 
The empty desk and abandoned room
All signs of your absence
Never again will that silly grin
Flash across your face
Never again hear that great booming laugh
“So who do I turn to,” I gasp, “when I need a friend?”
But only silence answers.
 
I don’t try to feel abandoned
I know it wasn’t your fault
But I can’t help wondering what was running through your head
Now I guess I’ll never know
“I needed you,” I cry, “I still do! Where are you?”
But only silence answers.
 
I want to feel at peace again
I’ve no idea how
Your footprints on this world are slowly receding
How could they forget so quickly?
So easily?
It’s a daily struggle for me to get up
Isn’t it for anyone else?
“How do I get better?” I yell. “Tell me!”
But only silence answers.
 
Some days I wish I could have been there with you
I immerse myself in memories
To find a respite from the pain
Other days I find myself laughing
Then guilt twists my stomach
And I again don the mask of grief
“No matter what others say, you’ll always be in my heart,” I choke.
But only silence answers.
 
The days wear on
It gets easier for me to breathe
A little of the crushing pain evaporates each day
And life goes on
“I’ll never forget you,” I swear, “never ever!”
But only silence answers.
 
Each day one less thought of you
Spirals through my mind
Are people forgetting
The wonderful person you were?
Still are, in spirit?
“They can’t forget,” I frown, “and they won’t!”
But only silence answers.
 
Roses bloom and raindrops fall
The world keeps turning
I think I finally understand
Why you never answered…
“You didn’t need to,” I smile.
The answer was with me all the time—
In my heart.
With you.
 
“I’m right, aren’t I…”
Only silence answers.
That’s good enough for me.


© Copyright 2018 Dannika Summers. All rights reserved.

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