My life as i saw it.

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic
This as a short stoy about my life. I just felt i needed to tell it.

Submitted: September 15, 2012

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Submitted: September 15, 2012

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This the story of my life thru my eye's. I'm sure that some people might not agree with me but all i can say this based on my experiences.

January 16,1972 i Danny Gonzalez was born, no wait i was told diffrent by my mom or is it that no one knows when i was born. I will addresse this later on so keep reading. Born in santiago Dominican Republic(i think. Youngest of a family of 5 sisters and 2 brothers. I came over to the United States according to my parents in 1974 and lived some where in New York. Ok now follow this weird childhood that i can remember. There is very few things i can remember about my childhood but one thing that i always rememeber but tried to convince myself it didn't. Ok so now hold on to your seat, i recall one day i was riding my bike from freeport long island (where we live) to my friend chris house in baldwin long island. Chris was the nephew of my sisters husband. Well he had a few uncles i got along with, i guess it was because i really didn't have a close relationship with my brothers. Anyway i'm side tracking, one of his uncle who name was Alberto was there from what i recall. I remember chris wasn't there why i don't remember but the little i do remember was not a great thing. I recall alberto having me sit somewhere i think and basically in short words touch me in my privates and i recall him making me touch his and saying \"do u like it\". I was scared and shocked but at the same time i was like is this normal. After that i really don't remember how or when did i get home or what actually happened. My whole life i tried to understand if i dreamt that or did it happen. But Dang how can i remember that thru out my life.

Ok have patience with me cause i am going to be jumping around form one date to the other than back. A great friend came into my life her name is Ms Langley. She actually works for me but from the first day i met her two years ago i felt so comfortable talking to her. I have poured my heart to this stranger and for some reason its like she knew me. Well she would ask certain questions that made me relive my childhood. But one question she asked i dont have a clear answer for it. She asked me to tell her something happy about my childhood. Wow that was a hard question. I had no words i told her i can't remember a good memory that made me very happy. But then i recalled one. How old i dont recall but i was in middle school. I wanted named brand sneakers so bad so i could be cool in school and get the girls. Oh by the way i had alot of girls hitting on me but i was so shy and so afraid that i did't know how to approach them. Anyway back to the story, i wanted good sneakers so bad but couldn't afford them..But here comes my awesome sister sonia who later in life was always there for me. She had a used pair of nike yes nike. I was omg even before omg was popular, and i was so happy. But one problem i had feet about 3 inches more than sonia. I was determined i am wearing this shoes tomorrow no matter what.

Across from where live was a small shoe shop and i went there and asked can you stretch these. Than man working there probably thought i was crazy but he put the shoes in some type of she vise to stretch them. He said this might help a little but not a lot. Im going to skip alot of things and go straight to the day i was going to wear them. I got up early got dressed and then attempted to put the sneakers on. Jeez they were so tight so i removed my sock so they could fit a little better. I walked about 3 miles to school pain free cause all i can think about is how i will be the cool kid. And just as suspected all these cute and not cute girls were straying and talking yo me. The guys were giving me high fives and looking at my new shoes. Dont get me wrong i had several friends but i just wanted to be cool. School is out time to go home, and now the moment that i was going to dread removing the shoes. I removed my shoes and not only did they stink because i had no socks on but i had two huge huge blisters on my heels. They were so painful but to me it didn't matter cause i was the cool kid for that day. Thats what i remember being very happy.

Now some parts of my life that are confusing so pay attention. Im going to skip a lot n go straight to the day me,my dad,my ex wife dad and her sisters husband sat at a table just chatting..out of the blue her sister husband says to my dad hey danny wants to get married. I never told him i wanted now. So i expected the normal response from my dad like he is too young not now. Instead he said when can we set a date. Wow did my dad want to get rid of me that bad? So as time goes by I'm more and more depressed for what reason i don't know. I have wonderful children a good job but something is lacking. And the she came into my life.....But thats a little later.

Ok confusing now..i was born jan 16 1972 in santiago dominican republic. The son of jose gonzalez and lidia delarosa. Or i think i am, why you ask well check this out. As i got older my mom got me a passport so we could travel back and forth but one thing wrong with it. The date of birth is april 03 1972!!! So i asked my mom why and she said that when i was born it took her and my dad 4 month to recognize me as a son. Yup weird, from what she said that they could't obtain my birth certificate when i was born so they got it in april. Im not the smartest guy in the world but that sounds like crap. So all my brothers n sisters were born in the dominican republic but one. My young sister sonia who is about 4 years older than me. So if my sister was born here why would my mom fly with me pregnant with me back to the dominican republic just to give birth? Why would she do that, did she cheat on my dad which is why she went back to have me? Is my dad my real dad? Why took 4 months for me to be recognized as there son? Oh well then i guess i am a bastard child hahaha.

Ok so is that why my family treats me diffrent? Is that why they all drive or fly from ny to florida but can't stop to visit me? Is that why i found out my grandfather dies days after he was buried? Is that why i have nieces and nephews i never met? Is that why they have alot of family functions and im not invited? Is that why i usually find out my mom and dad are in ny a day before they are ready to fly back to the dominican republic? Is that why my mom and dad have nothing more than pure hatred towards each other? Is that why i never remember my mom or dad saying i love you? Is that why i always thought i was never good enough for anything or anybody? Is that why i have a low self esteem? So many questions non that i will ever find out. Yes if you want to know i have cried not having a family member aside from my sis sonia to call for advice, or have a brother that i can look upto..i built a tough skin and always said i don't care that they don't visit me but deep down inside it tore my heart out.

Ok enough bad stuff now the story about that girl..one day like many days i was working out at planet fitness. I was working out chest and just happened to look back and oh my god..the most beautiful girl i ever seen. Long black hair amazing body sexy eyes..well u get it. So i happened to go by where she is working out and i began to do push ups. As shy as i am and timid i had the courage to speak to her. We talked about different ways to work her back and i asked do u want to come over to a different area so i can show you another workout. Yup she agreed. She came over towards me and i could not but stare at her. Well i showed her some workouts and showed her how to use a workout bench. Now how do i ask this girl out? Well i told her if she wanted to workout sometimes and she said yes..so i told her \"do you want my email\" yea email thats what i said. She asked for my number and i think she thought i was a moron. And that began the amazing adventure that made me such a happy man. Now begins the danny and peyton journey.

A few months after meeting we headed to new york on vacation. Now i lived in ny my whole life so i knew i was going to impress her with my new york knowledge. After arriving in new york we began to enjoy our vacation by doing what you do on vacation..eat and eat and eat. Omg on tuesday we each ate around 10,000 calories and walked over 30 miles. We did alot there so im not going to tell the whole storythere all i can say my love for her grew in ny. As times passed we grew closer, and i grew closer to her family. What an amazing family her mom is like an angel who showed me nothing but love. Just how she hugged me and her dad shook my hand and her brothers n sister embraced me i felt so loved. Was it wrong for me saying to myself \"i wish this was the mom and dad i never had\".

Just when everything was perfect i managed to do what i always do..screw up a perfect relationship. During vac in myrtle beach peyton found emails of me flirting with a girl from work. Yea im an idiot i dont deserve the love she gave me. Now fast forward she gave me another chance. Things were getting better i finally started going to church with her, but like always i screwed up. I downloaded a pic from a porn site n meant to send it to a friend but made a mistake n sent it to her. Yup all hell broke loose, but what made it worst is that i panicked and lied about it. Even to the point that i had a friend text her and say it was his girlfriend in the picture. Well she left me and yes i begged and pleaded but i will never blame her. I messed up i hurt her i didnt deserve her love. So here i am now crying alot and feeling so empty. I managed to hurt the love of my life i hurt my future wife. God knows how much i love peyton oh so does ms Langley cause im always crying around her and talking about peyton. God is now in my life and i have faith in him i have faith in that he will protect,love,nurture peyton. He will give peyton what she deserve. Dont get me wrong i pray that its me but he has a plan and if its not his will then i will understand.

Ok so this was a brief detail about my life. I cant say it all at once because there is always a part two to every story. But i have learned alot recently i have learned about my life. I still make stupid mistakes and unsure about my future, but three things im sure about is, i love Peyton, i love and accept christ, and i love ms Langley.

Well hope this all made sense cause it does to me. I know its not written with proper words and punctuations, but hey thats how i am.

I decided to write this not to get sympathy about my life, or to get Peyton back. I wrote this because god told me too...

I love you Peyton punkin pressley.


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