Painfully In Love With You

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
Written to someone who will never see this...From the depths of my very soul.

Submitted: May 05, 2011

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Submitted: May 05, 2011

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It's been a year since I've admitted it to myself: that I've been intoxicated; poisioned.

& of course, once the poision has entered and infected someone,

it can never quite leave one's system.

But there's definetly more to it then just that.

Your eyes are extremely beautiful; I can never look into them, because I know that if I do, I'll lose my control. I'll quiver in fear and in nervousness.

Your smile completely shines a powerful light on the darkest of my days; But sometimes I honestly wish that I could have been the person that made you smile.

Your voice is comforting and soft; Yet it enslaves me, and leaves me dazed & confused.

I find myself thinking about you all the time; That's the simple truth.

You don't leave my mind.

It makes me smile and sometimes I don't even realize it.

I can't understand myself.

I'm so tired of the agony of seeing you everyday

& knowing that I'm just another person in your world

Yet wishing that you knew, that you are my world.

I can't stand the misery

But I know I have to; I have no other choice.

Because I can't deal with the thought of you looking at me differently than you do now.

I know I'll have to stay like this.

As your bestfriend,

As someone who promises to be there when everyone else walks away

As a person who looks at you, and remembers why they decided to hold onto lyfe in the first place.

& I told myself, time and time again

To never allow this feeling into my system.

But it was just my luck, that I couldn't stop it.

It got in, and it hurts.

I know it sounds obsurd. But I can't help it.

I promise, though, that I will try my best to try to get rid of every feeling.

I will try not to care about any aspect of you anymore;& Then maybe then it won't hurt so much

But please just remember that, It will be hard for me.

It will be hard to let go of every word, and every moment that I realized I cared more and more about you.

Every spark of happiness that you gave me, I will try to erase.

But you meant something beautiful to me 3 years ago, & you still mean that much now.

So I'm sorry if I can't stop right away. But everytime you look at me, just know I'm trying

& please, just know.

That I'm Painfully In Love With You.


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