What? What's Condom Store?

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is for Eddie's writing contest. Hope you all like it :D

Submitted: September 12, 2012

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Submitted: September 12, 2012




What? What's Condom Store?


I was off to school one day when I heard this lousy music coming from somewhere. The beat was catchy. The lyrics? I have no idea what it meant but it kind of makes me want to nod simultaneously with the beat. I didn’t pay much attention to it until I reached our classroom.

“Heeeeey Sexy Ladies” I heard my classmates shout that words and their all laughing to it. Now I started to get a bit curious. My best friend, Jay was in the corner. He’s been doing assignments of my other classmates for as long as ever. I didn’t want to disturb him but I need to borrow a minute to fulfill my curiosity. I’ve asked him what they were up to and he just answered something I didn’t actually get.

“It’s that Gangnam style craze. It’s quite a trend right now.” he said.

I didn’t have any idea what he said nor how he had pronounced it.

“What?” I baulked. “What’s Condom Store?”

Jay almost busted in laughter but he stopped it with a chuckle. “It’s not condom store, silly. It’s Gangnam Style.”

My face was fishy. I couldn’t get how he’d pronounce it. Well, of course, it’s just simple but it’s too alien to me.

“Come again?” I said. I couldn’t quite get it.

“Gang-Nam Style” he slowly said. “Should I say it again?”

I gasped and said syllable by syllable. “Gang – Nam – Style.” I sighed after. “Did I get to pronounce it correctly?”

Judging on Jay’s facial expression, I got a satisfactory rate. “You’ve got it.” He finally said.

I smiled to myself. Somehow, I got proud in some point. I didn’t remember how I managed but in just a moment later, I stood up in class and shouted the word while unaware, our teacher was already coming inside.

“Open Condom Store!” I shouted loudly.

My classmates, Jay and even our teacher started staring at me in a freakishly awkward way. It was like the whole world had stop for five seconds until my classmates busted in laughter. I felt like my whole body had started to melt like I would wish I didn’t exist in that very moment.

“What did you say, Mr. Parker?” Our teacher didn’t look so good.

“Uhm.” I paused. I didn’t know how to react. My world just stopped in a moment. I would rather faint that time. “Nothing, ma’am.”

My jaws were shivering. My knees were trembling and weakening. I was looking side by side to my classmates. They were secretly laughing and murmuring.

“Well, do you know what that meant?” Our teacher was getting furious than calm.

My eyes bulged wide. I breathe heavily until I couldn’t speak anything but gesture a disagreeing response.

My teacher took out a paper and wrote something. Showed it in my face and said.


My classmates laughter just got worse. Suicidal thoughts went in and out of my mind. I’ve promised myself one thing that day. I will never ever hear that song for the rest of my freaking life.

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