My Baby

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

It came to me while laying in bed trying to fall asleep it started off as just an idea but i couldn't stop my fingers from typing it. (this was typed on my phone)

And as I sat there with the barrel in the side of my head, all I could think to say to myself was I'm sorry and I pulled the trigger. And it was over just like that, but then something happened it's like I was flying I could see my body on my bed missing half my head and then my dad ran in and when he saw the mess he immediately started to weep, now I had never seen him weep before and I don't mean cry, I've seen him cry plenty of times but never actually weep. It was possibly the worst thing I had ever witnessed. As my dad sat there on my bed next to my lifeless body he called the police, and then my mother, who when she got there broke down at the door way to my room. My mother had cried in front off me a lot before but never like this, I reached out to put my hand on her shoulder but it passed right through her. That's when I really knew I was dead. I actually watched the police wrap my body up and carry it out,

my mom and dad were sitting on the back step talking to a cop. Well my mom was talking, my dad just kind of sat there, his eyes looked empty as if his whole world was just ripped away, that's when my sisters got there. None of them knew what was going on until they saw my parents but not me, my youngest sister (still older than me though) was the first to get to my room. She saw the stained walls and ran out to my parents sobbing and my other sisters followed suit. I heard the police officer ask if my mom knew why I had done it, she said she had no clue and again my dad just kind of stared. God, what I would do to just hug him one more time. My mom and sisters did this weird like 4 person hug thing and I just kind of positioned my self in the middle. I remember hugging them, it always felt so warm and filled with love. Now I just felt cold and empty. They all stayed at a hotel that night.

The car ride there was silent and the same with dinner. Then suddenly my youngest sister said "I miss him it doesn't feel the same" then she started sobbing again. I got as close to her as I could and tried to hug her. But I couldn't. I just went through her. I tried to kiss her forehead or hold her hand and still nothing. I screamed "I'M STILL HEAR JUST LOOK AT ME PLEASE" and that's when I really knew I'm gone to them. I took myself away from them. The people who loved me most I betrayed. These people that were there every time I got a bruise. Every time a girl broke my heart they were there and I stole something irreplaceable to them. My wake was the next week. Seeing my family there, aunts and uncles all crying friends, and best friends holding back tears, so many plans broken because of me. And then I saw her, the love of my life. the girl I wanted to marry. Just sitting there staring at the coffin, crying, hating me for what I had done, for leaving her there alone. I moved to her and kissed her cheek. And again I screamed for what seemed like hours for her to just look at me. But it didn't work she just kept starting at the coffin. That's when I knew I had taken love from her. I tried to get anyone to see me until no one was left at the funeral home except my dad. He was kneeling by my coffin whispering, but no matter how close I got I could not hear what he was saying, until I saw him mouth the words I love you and then get up and walk away. I waited there and then started screaming at myself. "why would you do this?" "do you see what they are going through?" "who do you think you are putting him through this? Putting all of them through this?" These were all directed at the coffin. But no answer.

I walked home from the funeral home and went to my room, it was left how I left it except the blood was gone. I layed down in my bed and stared at the ceiling. I cried, I just cried until the sun came up. Well actually I woke up when the sun came up. So I sat up and enrolled the familiar smell of bacon on a Sunday morning. It must have all been a dream. I walked out and saw that my dad was watching a western and my mom was on the computer. I said hey and grabbed some bacon. Except the bacon didn't move, my parents had red eyes and bags under their eyes. I couldn't believe it, I really did it, I was really gone. My mom was watching old videos of the stupid things I did on YouTube and was looking through my Facebook pictures, when she got to a picture of me looking right into the camera she put her hand to the screen and began to cry. My dad got up and went to her and held her,again more whispering but I couldn't hear what she was saying all I could make out was "my baby".


Submitted: August 05, 2013

© Copyright 2022 Dean Henry. All rights reserved.

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