The Yogurt Theory

Reads: 978  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 2

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Reddit
  • Pinterest
  • Invite

More Details
Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
While searching for something to eat, I had an epiphany, that there are too many options in life and these options are extremely, complex for an indecisive individual such as myself. That's when it hit me, picking a type of yogurt to eat is the same as deciding on what I want out of life. Choices, choices and more choices.

Submitted: November 21, 2013

A A A | A A A

Submitted: November 21, 2013

A A A

A A A


I was aimlessly wandering around the kitchen. While having a conversation with myself, like always: first voice says: I am hungry! The second voice (Oi, that sexond voice, is  so fukakta ! Makes my blood boil and churn) :  what do I want? I could cook something…but I don’t want to cook. Why do I always have to cook?  first voice: I am hungry!
So, I lazily stroll over to the fridge.  I open the fridge door, in the fridge their is a ton of food: second voice: But what do I want? Um….I want that. Wait, no I don’t! Fuck, why do I always have to cook!!! WTF!
As you can see by now, this was not getting me anywhere. I again opened the fridge door, found yogurt. I like yogurt and I am hungry. That should have stopped me right than and there. But crap, there are different flavors and variations of this YOGURT!
 I took all the flavors out of the fridge, set them in a row on the table. Regular Greek yogurt, strawberry Greek yogurt, pomegranate Greek yogurt, blueberry Greek yogurt. I think you get the hint by now. First voice in my head: I am hungry, I don’t care about the flavor. Second voice: But are you sure you want strawberry over blueberry? First voice: I don’t care, sure blueberry. Second voice: Are you sure blueberry of pomegranate? This went on for another hour. With final decision, screw yogurt. I didn't’t want it in the first place. 
I was right back where I started not just hungry, pacing around the kitchen, but now angry at the Yogurt! On a positive note, that was the beginning of my Yogurt theory. 
Have you ever gone grocery shopping? You know when you go into the frozen aisle and stare at all the variation of frozen foods, the make, the price. Talk about overwhelming choices. Not to mention when you are simply going to the store to get something as simple as yogurt. Holy crap, the choices are mind blowing! For an indecisive individual such as myself. That involves a lot of hair pulling, yelling at the yogurt, and leaving the store empty handed, because who knew shopping for yogurt was that difficult! No one ever told me, that it was that hard. And than, my epiphany: my whole life I’ve been attempting to decide what type of yogurt I want, and since all of “lives variations of yogurt” make me go crazy. I throw my hands up in the air out of despair. Give up and run away. Miserable, unhappy and pissed off at the”yogurt”.(Trust me, you do not want to know, the obscenities that second voice in my head was yelling at the Yogurt! I was shocked a bit myself. )
That’s when I realized, all my life I’ve been going around in circles. Not knowing what I wanted, but knowing I wanted something. It was always so much easier to let someone else tell me what type of “yogurt” I wanted. 
Unfortunately, when someone else chooses for you, in the end you realize you never even wanted that in the first place. Yup, you guessed go right to the beginning and once again stand around, deciding on what type of “yogurt” I want. 
 Forest Gump said it: Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you will get. Unfortunately, the unexpected freaks me out! As it should any normal well behaved control freak, such as me. That is why, I am now training on how to leave the grocery store with something as simple as “yogurt”.


© Copyright 2020 Diana Kouprina. All rights reserved.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Reddit
  • Pinterest
  • Invite

Add Your Comments:

Comments

avatar

Author
Reply

avatar

Author
Reply