Life Happens

Reads: 423  | Likes: 1  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 0

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Reddit
  • Pinterest
  • Invite

Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic


How can a man who loses all, find happiness?


Well, where should I start? Once I lived in a house far outside any civilization. And as you could guess it is a very, very small house. One step in and you could see everything that it has. But it was mine you know? As little as it was, I had something I could call my own. What do I have left now? Nothing. I sit here on the park bench in the "greatest City" in the whole world, New York City. But amongst all these people, I never felt more empty or more alone. All my friends from my old Highschool said: "Come on Joey, you have to live your life". I always dreamt about it, to become a known writer, but...this? I don´t know. My former life seemed to be perfect. I  had my little cabin in the woods. I had my childhood friends, more or less near me, and I had my love. My childhood love that grew into something special. Undescribable special. But life wasn't easy at any time in my life. My parents had terrible problems. My father drunk too much after he lost his job, at my mother was to this point at home. She had to care for our house and for their little son. But everything changed dramatically. Nobody had a job. My mother had to search one for months. We had some savings so we could pay the rent but the food was thin sometimes. That my father drunk the hell out of him, didn't help either. 
Now they are both gone. My dad died of his addiction. And my mom grew alone and full of stress old and in the middle of her fifties, she became senile. 
I heard about my mother's sickness at my 26th birthday through my aunt. My mom was too worried about my well-being to tell me this herself. I just thought it was selfish at this time. But now I know there is more to it. We had a rough past. So I dropped everything and flew to my childhood home to care for the woman that cared for me my whole life. It was awful and devastating to see your mother forgetting her life basically. It was the worst time of my life, but I couldn't live with myself if I wouldn't have stayed with her. 
Grace was always strong. Stronger than I ever was. At this time, and especially at the funeral of my mother, she held me tight, otherwise, I would have crumbled to my feet. The lost of my mother who always had my back was hard for me. I couldn't write for a very long time. Again, the only strength I had at this time was through the support from my guardian angel. But of course, that didn't last long...
Grace and I met in high school and we fall for each other instantly. But it was a case of will they or won't they for almost a year. But inevitable we kissed each other for the first time at a party of a mutual friend. Since then we were inseparable. And we married quickly after school, we were both around 21 and a little bit foolish. But don't you know the feeling when everything just feels right? 
And then life happened, again. I lost my rock, my better half, the love of my life. 
We discovered that she has cancer about 5 years after my mother died. She was always the stronger one of us. But at this moment, where we sat at the doctors and he told us the fantastic news...I saw the pure horror and terror in her eyes. The news alone broke everything in me, but her look was the last piece that destroyed me completely. Her beautiful blue eyes, blank as a paper. At this moment, I realized I had to be the strong one for a change, I had to support and strengthen her. But it was all too late, her cancer was too far developed. Her body lost slowly in strength. First, she had to quit her job because she couldn't teach her children at the school anymore. Then she couldn't do easy tasks like washing dishes anymore. So I had to care for as I had to do it with my mother. The last weeks of her illness were especially hard because she got weaker day by day. But the last moment with her was the more precious. She knew that her time was to go. And she looked at me with her incredibly hopeful look. She said that I will be fine and that I will find happiness again. That I have untold stories that will inspire a lot of people, and the last thing she said was: "Thank you for always being the strong one. I love you J.." She couldn't finish saying my name as she passed away in my arms. 
I had friends and family of her helping with her funeral because I wasn't able to do anything really.  I do not remember much from that time because I was mentally just not there anymore, and then the funeral came. The moment to find some closure, the moment to let it all out. And it was devastating for me. I had nobody anymore to hold me tight, so this time I broke down and fall to my feet, sobbing and screaming. I questioned life, and every god there is why I had to suffer so much, why of all people did she has to die.
I barely lived the following year, until my friends convinced me to move to NY and try to publish some of my stories. It worked surprisingly, some stories were indeed published. But real happiness never came back. 
Now we are at this day, three years after the death of Grace and the death of myself as well. Now all I want is getting my loved ones back, I want to hold my mother, I want to talk with my father about sports, and I want to lay in the loving and strong arms of my soulmate. All this is just one click away.


Submitted: November 12, 2017

© Copyright 2021 Drake. All rights reserved.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Reddit
  • Pinterest
  • Invite

Add Your Comments:


Facebook Comments

Other Content by Drake

Short Story / Other