How much longer?

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
striving to love, live, and let go

Submitted: March 13, 2010

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Submitted: March 13, 2010

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Here I am, living on the brink of life.
Standing at the edge of the world and looking down,
I see nothing but spacious layers of mist below
Engulfed by the lust to free fall, to let go
Yet at the same time, I want to hold on
I want to step back, I still want to stand
But for how much longer will I stand?
How much longer until I fulfill this single demand?
Will you catch me if I fall?
For it’s all I’ve been waiting for around it all,
Throughout my whole life I’ve searched for you.
But how much longer will it be till you search for me too?
 
I lived a half life of deception and pain,
Reaching out to you was scarcely heartache in vain.
I can’t take this anymore for I fought through it all,
I’ve cried my last tears now it’s time to take the last fall.
I let of go of it all and time feels like it going faster,
When falling through endless clouds below makes everything feel slower.
A heavy breeze rushes through my veins,
Through the air I am breathing,
Between each strand of hair,
Through my body and my soul,
I take my deepest breath and then hold…
 
I shut my eyes and a last tear draws.
Thank you for a life full of preeminent flaws.
At last I open them,
And, what’s this?
I am floating in the arms of a mysterious angel,
Whose face looked closely humble yet so vaguely imperceptible,
Whose arms delivered me to you,
Just when I thought I would never see you again
 
I stand before you
And there—you stand as a mere recollection of interminable memory,
My heart is permeated by a sharp pain/
By a deep sense of consolation
I can’t find the words to manifest this abiding love of mine,
For I can only entrust it all within you
 
I run into your arms with nothing holding me back,
But the wind behind itself
I felt like I was falling again.
Only it was you who stood to catch me.
I love the way you hold me in your arms
I love you the way you love me
Even through times you were absent in my life,
I’d think—how much longer would it be?
Till I’d cease almost every night still waking up crying tears,
Because of the lone thought of you on my mind
 I still love you so.
Always have and always will.
Because of you I can’t ever let go.
 
But being in your arms,
Feels like being wrapped up in a fragile blanket.
Like a blanket of cloud in the sky,
Where nothing could disturb me and I could sleep forever.
Like our love,
You might wonder—how much longer could we stand as this?
Where nothing can stand in our way—
For as long as we imaginably desire
Perhaps we could remain this way forever.  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


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