Of Broken Hearts

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
It was a gloomy day, with rain falling on their rooftops. They both lost what they once had, with no hope of getting it back. They wanted to escape the pain. They couldn't. They just chose not to.

Submitted: May 17, 2008

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Submitted: May 17, 2008

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I

Opening his eyes, Alfonso Monzon recognized the feel of Saturday morning. Without even looking outside, he knew that today was going to be a dark and gloomy day. He could hear the drip-drop of the rain on his rooftop. He looked at his calendar, and a bitter wind of regret brushed against his body. It was the 21st of May. “What a lovely day,” he muttered, with a hint of acid in his tone. He stood up from his bed, and paced around his room. He knew that today wasn’t any different from the days that have passed, but there was something in the air which made his body tremble, like he was about to go on his first date. “Today’s the day,” he sighed as he talked to his reflection in the bathroom mirror. “She’s going to hurt you again, and what are you gonna do about it, Alfonso? Nothing! Because you’re a wimp, a loser, you deserve to be unhappy!” Everytime he looks back at what had happened, his heart turns into glass, and gets shattered into a million pieces. Everything in the outside world freezes, and only he and his wonderful memories of her exist. At this time, Alfonso was already done showering. Off to work he was, even if his body didn’t want him to. He felt like a huge boulder was on top of him. His body felt heavy. He couldn’t breathe.

II

He left the house for work, and was off to a wedding. Driving to his destination was supposed to be easy for him. He had a car, a map, and easy-to-read directions going to the place. He’s used to this. He’s used to accepting jobs in unfamiliar places – a new adventure he always says. But this one for him has been surprisingly difficult. He knows he has to do it, but his body doesn’t want him to. He wanted to think it was just an ordinary wedding, but it wasn’t. It was Liana’s. As he was driving, images of her flooded his head. It was a just an ordinary day. As he sat on the seashore, he wanted the roaring waves in front of him to engulf him so that he would hurt no more. It had been a year since he and Liana had ended their relationship, but the pain was still there. The urge to runaway and hide from all humanity was still in him. He wanted to vanish. As all of these thoughts scrambled through his head, a voice suddenly came from behind, releasing him from his stupor. “Alfonso,” the voice called out. Upon hearing that painfully melodic sound, his body instinctively froze up, and beads of sweat started trickling down his forehead. Everything went into slow motion, and he fought the urge to feel scared. He knew whose voice that was, and he wasn’t expecting her to be there. “What are you doing here, Liana?” “I wanted to tell you something,” she replied. Alfonso’s heart was trying to escape his chest. “What is it?” his eyes not leaving Liana’s. “I-I’m getting married, and I want you to be there.” As Liana spoke those words, Alfonso felt a thousand daggers strike his heart. “You’re getting married?” Alfonso’s voice cracked a little. He was fighting so hard to keep his emotions intact, but his eyes were beginning to water. So for Liana not to notice this, he turned away to look at the crashing waves. “Congratulations!” he said. “And one more thing, Alfie, I want you to be my wedding photographer. Will you, Alfie?” “Sure.” Alfonso smiled. “I’ll be there. Anything for you, Liana.” she hugged him as tight as she could, and thanked him. With that, Liana walked away not knowing the pain she had caused him.

III

A cacophony of honking and shouting had snapped Alfonso back to reality. He had been parked in the middle of the highway for 5 minutes, staring blankly into space. Then, a police officer approached his car. Alfonso rolled down his window. “Sir, please move your car now. Haven’t you realized that you’re causing traffic?” “Sorry, sir. Just had a bad case of heartburn.” he lied.

And so he drove on. As he neared the church, thoughts of Liana filled his mind. His heart was overflowing with remorse, but he had to be strong. He then remembered what his mother told him. “Alfonso, people change. Sometimes, we have to go on with life without them. There are certain things that we can’t explain, but just happen for a reason. Sometimes, we can show our love for a person by setting them free, and letting them be happy even if that happiness doesn’t include us. That’s what love is truly about.” His mother’s voice continued to ring in his head. “Even if that happiness doesn’t include you…”

As he got out of his car, the majestic cathedral met his eyes. He was overwhelmed by the beauty of the place. This place hit home. He remembered a similar church. Its beauty held a very special place in Alfonso’s heart. It held beautiful memories, and that was all that it was ever going to be, now. Alfonso’s heart started to beat rapidly again. He knew that he still loved her, and he didn’t want to love anyone else. He felt so desperate, but he knew that there was no way for him to get Liana back. “I still love her.” he said to himself, as tears started to well up in his eyes. “I still love her with all my heart.”

Behind him, people were crowding the car that had just arrived. It was a Mercedes-Benz S65 AMG. It was beautiful, but even more beautiful was its passenger. It was the bride. He approached Liana as she was getting out of the car. He was there to do his job, but instead, he stood there frozen, mesmerized at Liana’s sight. She looked stunning, and she was glowing. Alfonso looked at her as if he was seeing her for the first time. Her eyes, her skin, her smile – her smile – everything about her was captivating. Suddenly, a pang of sadness hit him. She was happy. Something he knew he could never give her, now. “Excuse me, aren’t you the photographer? What else are you waiting for? Do your job, will you?” an elderly man spoke from behind him. “Oh, pardon me, sir. Sorry about that.” With every photograph that he took, old wounds from the past were reopened.

As the ceremony took place, Alfonso just kept on doing his job. He didn’t want to fail Liana, even if the pain was unbearable. “Anything for her.” he said. When the ceremony was over, he just let himself fall on the steps of the cathedral. He couldn’t take it anymore. It was just too painful. He knew he had to go to the reception, but he couldn’t. He didn’t want to. And as if the heavens felt his pain, it started to cry along with him. The next events became unclear. He just found himself on a hospital bed, with Liana right next to him. “What happened back there?” she asked. “You know, Liana, you shouldn’t be here. You should be with your new husband. He might be looking for you.” “Don’t worry, Alfonso. He knows where I am.” she replied. “I want to be with you right now, because I know you need me. We’re friends, right? And friends look out for each other.” Those words were like rubbing salt onto his fresh wounds. He couldn’t accept the fact that he and Liana would just be friends. He wanted them to be together until they grew old. He wanted them to raise a family together, but now he had lost all hope. “Liana, just leave.” he suddenly said. “We can’t be friends, at least for now. Please, just leave.” And without knowing what to say, Liana left trying to hold back the tears in her eyes.

She found herself crying inside her car. She felt guilty because she had hurt a man who respected her, and still loved her even if she had hurt him. She felt guilty because she never explained why she had left him. She just left without even saying goodbye. She felt ashamed of what she had done. “Liana,” Alfonso said to her. “I love you.” “I love you too, Alfie. I love you so much.” Liana smiled and replied. “Whatever happens to us, I would always love you, just as long as you promise me that your love for me will never change. Promise?” he asked. “I promise.” Liana replied as she kissed him tenderly on the lips. As she looked back on that day, on top of that beautiful church, she realized that she wasted a love that was real. Now, there’s no turning back. Her heart is now bound to someone else’s – someone she doesn’t love. “I don’t want this.” she said to herself.

On the other hand, Alfonso’s condition had gone worse. According to the doctors, he had acquired an illness called Myocarditis. It is a disease wherein the muscular part of the heart swells up due to a viral or bacterial infection. This had been the main reason for his breathlessness and chest pains for the past months. He was losing hope. The unfortunate events in his life had already caused him enough misery, and now this. He wants to runaway from his thoughts. He wants to leave everything behind, because he feels like his life has no more meaning, especially now that Liana is out of it. He wants to forget her badly, but he couldn’t. He doesn’t want to.

After several days of tests and medications, the hospital had finally released Alfonso. He went home only to find himself feel more depressed. He went through his things to look for everything that reminded him of Liana. He wanted to throw them away, so that he could forget her more easily. But as he looked at each and every object that meant a lot to him, his condition got worse.

Liana went back to the hospital only to find out that Alfonso had already been discharged. He was gone, and she got worried. She knew that Alfonso wasn’t well yet, and feared what he might do to himself. She went to his house, and when she arrived, she found the place a mess. She found Alfonso on the couch, staring at Liana’s wedding pictures, tears streaming down his face. “Alfonso,” she called out. “What are you doing here?” he asked bitterly. “I thought I told you that I didn’t want to see you? Here, take your wedding pictures, so I wouldn’t have anything to do with you anymore.” He threw the pictures at Liana. “Take them and leave!” Alfonso cried angrily. “Alfonso, I’m sorry for everything, for the pain that I’ve caused you. Could you just please… Forgive me?” “I don’t know, Liana. You’ve hurt me so much, and being alive would mean I’d have to put up with the pain of not being able to be with you.” “What do you mean by that?” Liana asked, surprised. “Never mind. Please, just leave. I beg you.” As Liana turned to walk away, Alfonso started gasping for air. He felt like his chest was under a huge boulder. A surge of immense pain swallowed his heart. And with one last painful breath, he watched Liana walk away. She wanted to explain, but she couldn’t. He didn’t want her to.

It was a gloomy day, with rain falling on their rooftops. They both lost what they once had, with no hope of getting it back. They wanted to escape the pain, but they couldn’t. They just chose not to.


© Copyright 2017 Emily Morose. All rights reserved.

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