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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
the new year is coming...

Submitted: December 22, 2015

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Submitted: December 22, 2015



A new year is coming. For some reason we let the calendar dictate when it’s appropriate to resolve the issues we have with ourself. It’s the old proverbial “new beginnings” where we look to turn back the clock. Our forthcoming clean slate holds promise for a better self. This year I will….blah blah blah. We hold true to these resolutions long enough to fool ourselves into thinking that we’ve actually committed to them. Two weeks into 2016 and we revert to the self loathing pieces of shit we always knew we were. Not surprisingly, you didn’t find love, you don’t have a six pack, and that ex you can’t get over still wets your eyes before they close for the night. Why do we wait a year to set these goals only to discard them so quickly? And then the cycle ensues and we wait for the next round like a boxer waiting for the bell. Ding ding ding. Time to lie to ourselves again. I think it’s important to slowly make changes one step at a time. You’re never going to drop the bottle and not look back. You won’t wake up happy and not love the person you can’t have. Truth is, it can take years. But let it. As you mature, nature starts taking its course and dissolving the things you couldn’t let go of. Grow as a person in all aspects and you will start to achieve your goals. But setting standards for yourself constrained by time and the pressures of your self-loathing will only bring you back to square one. I think it would be nice to look back in a few years and be someone else. Look back and smile at the heartache which then will all seem so petty. Time is the care taking matriarch of human lives. We live in the moments so hard that our heads remain up our asses and all we view is the shittiness which surrounds us. When you look at the high level view of it all, you see things aren’t so bad. My hopes for 2016 are simple. I hope I don’t lose who I am. I hope someone special enters my life. And I hope I experience a lot of happiness and pain. I’m still growing. Life is the wise gardener, and this flower is still blossoming.

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