I Would Be Willing

Would I lie for you?

It's happened so many times already

isn't it obvious

that I'm willing?

Would I cut for you?

I have three fading lines

so yes

I am willing.

Would I cry for you?

Yes

I do it all the time.

Would I get drunk for you?

Because of you

sometimes I wish I was.

I am willing.

Would I die for you?

I almost did

and although you may not like it

I am willing.

I am willing to destroy myself for you

and hurt and bleed and cry.

I'm willing to go through pain and hell

I'm willing to hang myself with knotted string

I'm willing to slice my flesh with the razor blade

harshly removed and harshly used.

I'm willing to trace the stars and paint the sky

dance in the rain and get covered in mud

if only to see your dimples

accompanied by your smile.

I said I got over you

and I did.

But now I realize that I can't give you up.

But

you're not willing to find happiness

you're not willing to take a risk

you're not willing to trust me

you're not willing to talk to me

you're not willing to listen

you're not willing to risk for the both of us.

It's all that I've been doing

and I hoped you'd noticed.

I need to stop caring

and stop feeling.

I need to move on

because you're not willing.